disco tech!

Like Lazarus.......sort of

2012-01-27T13:43:00.002-06:00

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We're under construction and just getting underway - but keep an eye out because the blog will be back soon...commentary on life and Texas Tech will soon be yours.

Regards,

BondJBond
AphrodisiacJackson
JacktheGooner

From Bye Week To Buy Game?

2009-09-16T18:36:00.004-05:00

"Have I got a deal for you!"

Well, the big showdown in Austin will be taking place in a few days. I wish I could sound more enthused, but it’s hard to. See, I have a sneaking suspicion bad things might happen. Believe me, I want to be wrong, I need to be wrong…Lord, let me be wrong. But I have this terrible sense of foreboding, and here’s why:

This week was, as we all know, originally supposed to be a bye week for Tech. It was only after some flummox occurred in UT’s schedule that DeLoss Dodds phoned up Gerald Myers and asked if Tech would be interested in moving the game up to September 19, rather than its original date in late October. Now, seeing as how I hate UT more than a Baptist preacher hates sin, I’d have told Dodds to pound sand, but that’s just me. Instead, the crafty (ahem) Myers then supposedly wrangled Tech a great deal, not only allowing Tech to take part in a nationally televised game at prime time with UT, but also securing television coverage of the U of H game thereafter. I’ve read that the rationale for agreeing to this was the television exposure, which would be good for recruiting. Effectively, UT filled up a week for one of its “buy games” with Tech’s bye week. Considering a few things, I wonder if this was such a good idea.

Most agree that Tech is a team that tends to start slow. As I watched Tech’s finely tuned machine literally dismantle Oklahoma State last November, I had a hard time reconciling that with the stumbling, sputtering Tech team I witnessed just two months prior scrape out an ugly win against Nevada. Because of its many moving parts, this is an offense that takes time to gel. I suspect practice can only go so far…true game conditions are needed to hone it to sharpness.

Consider the fact that Taylor Potts has had only two games, against opponents far inferior to UT, to experience running this offense. Having witnessed Potts against Rice, I can say he has a much stronger arm than Harrell, but is nowhere near as accurate. He seemed a little unsure at times (having to call a time out before the very first snap of the game is a bit of a “tell” I think), he didn’t check off to the run as I recall Harrell doing, and overall, he just seemed to be indecisive; all completely unstandable, given his level of experience. Don’t get me wrong; I think he has a great deal of talent, and provides weapons Harrell just didn’t have - this dude can chunk that ball a long way. I just think he would benefit from more time and experience before going up against the Number 2 team in the country, on enemy turf, no less. Tech also seemed to be playing musical chairs with its offensive linemen, indicating more fine tuning was needed. The defense looked pretty decent, allowing only one touchdown (heavily aided by flags at that), but come on, it was Rice for God’s sake. I mean, I wouldn’t want our guys to have to take them on in a slide rule contest, but face it, but this is football, and they ain’t UT. Thinking about all of this, well, I get a little squeamish.

I’ve had people who know football much better than I do tell me that Tech’s best chance of winning against UT is early in the season, rather than later. Moreover, I’ve even had UT fans tell me now is the most opportune time for a Tech win because their running game stinks, their defensive line is weak, etc. I just don’t find much solace in these beliefs. I don’t know what to say other than this arrangement just doesn’t feel right.

But, here’s the thing I have to keep in mind: how likely is it that Myers would have agreed to this deal without the countenance of Coach Leach? Not likely at all. Leach is too smart, and certainly is desirous of a win, to risk a loss for some of the exposure and extra scratch a prime time game might bring. This man has taken us a long way, so I’ll trust his judgment. I just hope Mike is as smart as I think he is…a nationally televised butt whipping sure won’t help recruiting much, at least not for Tech.

4th and Long - Week 1

2009-09-01T12:31:00.002-05:00

Okay ladies and gentlemen, it’s about time the most wonderful time of the year got here! After a long, hot summer that’s burned about half of Texas up, it’s time for some football!

****THURSDAY****

#16 Oregon at #14 Boise State (-4) – ESPN – The college football season gets started off with a bang in this matchup. Expect Oregon to pick up right where they left off under new coach Chip Kelly, and Boise State should have their usual high flying attack. Expect a wild, high-scoring affair in this game.
Boise State….49-45

****SATURDAY****

LA-Monroe at #2 Texas (-40.5) – FSN PPV – Colt McCoy and the Longhorns should have no problem with LA-Monroe, but ask Alabama how that turned out a couple of years ago.
Texas….48-17

#20 BYU vs. #3 Oklahoma (-22) (Arlington) – ESPN – The first college game in JerryWorld should be a decent matchu of two teams with very good offenses. Expect OU’s defense to slow down BYU’s passing attack quite a bit, and BYU’s defense shouldn’t pose too much of a challenge to OU’s offense.
Oklahoma….56-27

#5 Alabama (-7) vs. #7 Virginia Tech (Atlanta) – ABC – The marquee game of Week 1 should be close, although I expect that Virginia Tech’s tailback depth (or lack thereof) will be the deciding factor in this one.
Alabama….27-10

Navy @ #6 Ohio State (-21.5) – ESPN – The home opener for Captain Sweatervest and his team should be pretty uneventful (aren’t most games in the Big 11?), and Navy might scare them for a quarter, but that’s about it.
Ohio State….35-17

#13 Georgia @ #9 Oklahoma State (-5.5) – ABC – Ah, yes…it’s finally time to figure out if Okie Lite is for real. We’ll finally get the answer to the question of whether the Cowboys are pretenders or contenders, even though Georgia has a new starting quarterback and running backs. Expect Georgia’s defense to take away Dez Bryant with no solid #2 receiver on this team and no Brandon Pettigrew to keep them honest over the middle. And as we saw last year in the Holiday Bowl, no Dez Bryant means the Cowboys’ offense sputters.
Georgia….38-27

#11 LSU (-17) @ Washington – ESPN – A new coach won’t save the Huskies in this one, even if Les Miles does make a couple of boneheaded coaching moves.
LSU….52-21

Maryland @ #12 Cal (-21.5) – ESPN2 – Cal has a lot of talent returning this year…expect Maryland to hang close for the first half, but they won’t have the horses to keep up with Cal down the stretch.
Cal….42-24

Nevada @ #23 Notre Dame (-14.5) – NBC – As much as I would like to see the Irish fall flat on their faces against the Pistol Offense, it won’t happen in this one…too bad Nevada isn’t playing at home, their thug fans would enjoy taunting the Notre Dame players and fans.
Notre Dame….35-21

Florida Atlantic @ #24 Nebraska (-21.5) – FSN PPV – Nebraska should have a fairly easy time in this one, even if they are breaking in Zac Lee at quarterback.
Nebraska….45-18

Northern Colorado @ #25 Kansas (NL) – FCS Central – Looks like Mark Mangino went back to the cupcake schedule philosophy that served them well in 2007.
Kansas….56-7

Baylor @ Wake Forest (-2.5) – ABC/ESPN2 – Baylor gets the chance to show the country they are for real, and beating the Demon Deacons on their home field would give a tremendous boost to the Bears’ confidence early in the season.
Baylor….28-24

Missouri vs. Illinois (-7) (St. Louis) – ESPN – While this game has been quite entertaining the last couple of years, expect this game to go in the Illini’s favor early and stay that way.
Illinois….38-24

New Mexico @ Texas A&M (-14) – Although I don’t expect A&M to be very good again this year, the home crowd and the fact that they’re playing New Mexico should be enough to propel them to a season opening victory, unlike last year.
Texas A&M….24-17

North Dakota @ Texas Tech (NL) – Taylor Potts introduces himself to the Big 12 and the rest of the country with a huge first game performance against the hapless Fighting Sioux.
Texas Tech….66-14

UMass @ Kansas State (NL) – The return of Bill Snyder should be an easy W for the Wildcats.
Kansas State….45-14

****SUNDAY****

#8 Ole Miss (-16.5) @ Memphis – ESPN – Ole Miss returns just about everybody from last year, and I don’t see any way that Memphis will hang with them in this one.
Ole Miss….48-17

Colorado State @ Colorado (-10.5) – FSN – Colorado is the enigma of the Big 12 North….who knows how good/bad they’ll be this year? Colorado State shouldn’t put up much of a fight in the first game since the schools decided to ditch playing in Denver and going back to home-and-home.
Colorado….31-10

****MONDAY****

Miami @ #18 Florida State (-5.5) – ESPN – This game isn’t what it used to be, but Miami should be improved enough to hang with the Seminoles for at least a half.
Florida State….34-21

4th and Long's 2009 Top 25

2009-08-20T11:30:00.001-05:00

1. Florida – With Saint Tebow himself at quarterback, there’s no reason not to have the Gators at #1 to start off the year.

2. Oklahoma – The return of Sam Bradford, Jermaine Gresham, and Gerald McCoy, who all would’ve been top 50 picks in April’s draft, helps anchor this OU team that should pick up right where they left off last season.

3. USC – I know, I know…I hate USC as much as the next fan, but they get ranked here by virtue of playing in the Slack 10.

4. Ole Miss – Ole Miss returns most of their key guys from last year, and after the whooping they put on us in the Cotton Bowl, I’m a believer.

5. Texas – Even though the Horns have Colt McCoy and his favorite fishing buddy Jordan Shipley on offense, the lack of a dominant running back and the graduation of Quan Cosby are going to have more of an effect than most of the orangebloods think.

6. Alabama – I know they’re breaking in a new quarterback, but Bama’s still one of the best teams in the country…even if their fans are a bunch of unrealistic lunatics.

7. Ohio State – The Big 10+1 should be fairly weak again this year, so the team lead by Captain Sweatervest shouldn’t have a problem rolling up a lot of wins.

8. Penn State – See comment above about the Big 10+1…hopefully we won’t be subjected to another 13-6 pillow fight with Ohio State this year.

9. Virginia Tech – The ACC is looking nice and weak this year as well, so the Beamer Ballers shouldn’t have too much of a tough road in conference play…watch out for the game with Bama though.

10. LSU – Maybe, just maybe, the Bayou Bengals can find a decent starting quarterback somewhere on that roster. Too bad Mike Leach isn’t the coach there, or he could just go around the corner to the 7-11 and find one. Les Miles ought to look into wearing a hat that’s actually the right size instead of one that’s about 3 sizes too small, it might save him from some of his typical bonehead coaching decisions…or not.

11. Oregon – Oregon’s favorable schedule and God-awful uniforms (duck wings, anyone?) should allow them to challenge for the Slack 10 title and possibly even run the table in conference play.

12. Georgia – Although they lost Matthew Stafford and Knowshon Moreno to the NFL, the Bulldogs and Mark Richt (who I think is one of the top 3 or 4 coaches in college football) should be able to reload.

13. Oklahoma State – Ah yes, Okie Lite is this year’s media darling, and for good reason too with everybody they have coming back. The loss of Brandon Pettigrew will hurt more than everyone expects, and without a legitimate #2 receiver to take the heat off of Dez Bryant (hope you like being double teamed for the entire game, Dez!), I think the Cowboys will stumble. If they lose that first game to Georgia, sit back and get ready for the tailspin.

14. Georgia Tech – The weak ACC coupled with Georgia Tech’s option attack should allow the Yellow Jackets to have a great year and challenge for the ACC title.

15. Cal – Somehow, Jeff Tedford does it again…but don’t be surprised if the Bears slip a little bit with USC, Oregon, and Oregon State expected to be strong this season.

16. Boise State – We’ll know what Boise’s made of in their season opener against Oregon. They’re a slam dunk to win the WAC, so they could possibly run the table if they pull off the upset against Oregon in Week 1.

17. North Carolina – Butch Davis has been quietly building a solid team in Chapel Hill, and with what should be a fairly weak ACC this year, the Tar Heels should easily put up 8 or more wins.

18. TCU – Even though the Froggies return a lot of their key guys, I still don’t think they can keep it together for a full season and bust the BCS. I just wonder if Gary “Speed Baby” Patterson will go on another press conference rampage about how they get no respect if the Froggies do manage to beat both Virginia and Clemson on the road.

19. Florida State – The ‘Noles always have talent, but putting it together (and keeping some of that talent out of jail) has been the tricky part for Bobby “Diddy” Bowden here lately.

20. Utah – Utah lost a lot of key players from last season’s Sugar Bowl champion team, but Kyle Whittingham should keep them going strong.

21. Texas Tech – I would have us ranked higher were it not for our conference road schedule. That being said, I expect Taylor Potts to have a good yea, and if the defense steps it up from the level they played at last year (minus the OU and Ole Miss games), we could easily be in the top 15.

22. Iowa – Iowa should reap the benefits of a weak Big 10+1, although the loss of Shonn Greene will sting for a bit.

23. Nebraska – Who knows what Bo Pelini’s team will do in 2009? Sure, they should have a good defense, but with the quarterback question up in the air, that could hamper Nebraska in 2009.

24. Oregon State – With the slack 10 only having 4 decent or strong teams (USC, Oregon, Cal, Oregon State), the Beavers should rack up enough wins to stay in the top 25 for most of the season.

25. Kansas – The Jayhawks are loaded on offense, but if their porous defense doesn’t improve, they won’t win the Big 12 North. Their cross-division schedule against Big 12 South foes Texas, Oklahoma, and Texas Tech doesn’t help either.

Jerry Jones...hair piece or no?

2009-08-12T14:23:00.002-05:00

I say yes, but then again I can't stand the Cryptkeeper.

Riding the Moustache to Victory!

2009-08-11T11:47:00.027-05:00

Recently, photos of Taylor Potts surfaced with him sporting a new look. Gone is the wooly-man lumberjack look. Say "hello" to the 70's style, funk-a-matic, porn-a-riffic moustache wearing badass! This was a very good move on Potts' part, for reasons I will detail below.

I've heard many people describe Potts' lip adornment as a "Handlebar" moustache. Wrong. As a product of the 60's and a child of the 70's (when the moustache reigned supreme), I feel it is my solemn duty to straighten you youngsters out a little. In general, let me first say that the moustache is greatness. Potts' stache' is greatness. Wilfred Brimley's stache' is uber greatness; it has a mind of its own. Chuck Norris would just be a TV assclown with a bad toupee were it not for his stache', which gives him his power. Know the stache'. Respect the stache'. Fear the stache'.

But too many people are mislabeling the stache' now sported by Potts. What Potts is wearing is not a handlebar moustache. A handlebar moustache turns at the edge of the mouth and curls up, and is usually twisted into a point, and sometimes waxed. This is a handlebar moustache (and a damned fine example of one too):

Obviously, the baddest Handlebar ever was worn by the great Rollie Fingers:

What Potts is wearing is a "Fu Manchu." A Fu Manchu turns down at the end of the mouth, and, if seen fit by the wearer, continues down. How far down is discretionary, but the farther down, the more of a bad dude is its wearer. I am eminently qualified to assess and categorize this stache' due to my existence during the 1970's, when this style of moustache was at its height of popularity. Dudes sporting the Fu Manchu were badasses. It was a way to tell off "the Man" without saying a word. A Fu Manchu didn't have to spring for dinner to get laid. A Fu Manchu said to the women "Hey, baby" and it didn't sound corny. To the guys, it just said "F**k you", and, it meant it.

Some fine examples of the 70's Fu Manchu were:

Baseball pitcher Al Hrabosky, the "Mad Hungarian" was a dude you didn't jack with.

Anybody cooler than this guy? (don't bother, your answer is irrelevent):

The awesome power of the Fu' carried over into the 80's. Lemme tell ya somethin', brotha, you didn't screw with a guy sporting one of these:

See? Hogan's stache' transcended time and easily carried over into the 80's. It's not a question of keeping it too long, it's really more an issue of not getting one early enough. Timing is everything, my friends. Case in point:

C'mon...you think anybody would have given a damn about a little bong hit if he'd been sporting this bad boy in Beijing? Forget about it! Hell, those self-righteous dorks who were pulling their endorsement contracts would have been lining up for a little toke themselves if this was the guy they'd signed with.

The power of the moustache does not just pertain to sports...it crosses all fields of human endeavor. Let's consider the arts. Who would buy this guy's psychotic sketches were it not for the badness of his stache'?:

Want some more? Ok: get a load of this crap. Let's face it, my 12 year old can paint circles around this dude's primitive scribbles:

What makes it sell? Yep, the stache': (It should be noted that Neiman's badass stache' not only helps him peddle substandard art, it also got him a gig in Rocky III, along with our friend Hogan discussed above. All such fortuitous casting decisions were cleary attributable to some cool as hell facial hair).

Certainly, the world of politics is no stranger to the power of the stache'. You want examples? Well, fair enough. This guy was a bedwetting, asthmatic, nearsighted mama's boy, and, it's rumored, maybe even a closet homo (not that's there's anything wrong with that). Yet, he grew up to be President of these fine United States:
Do we even need to ask how? No, we don't. (Collar stays were optional back then).

Of course, you recognize this little teutonic troublemaker. Can you imagine how bad it could have gotten had he let that abomination under his nose actually grow into a full-fledged Fu Manchu?

Not to worry, though. Many of you don't know this, but much like the Manhatten Project, we had a team of top scientists and barbers locked away in a bunker devising a counter weapon to Hitler's formidable semi-stache' power. This was the result:Thankfully, we managed to beat the Hun conventionally before we had to unleash the awesome power of this magnificent development upon the world.

The power of the moustache transcends man, and pervades the animal kingdon as a whole. This little dude weighs only 2.3 pounds, but he could really mess you up, and he gets all the females in the troop. One guess why:

The power of the Fu or the Handlebar in sports is inarguable. Many sports badasses, across all athletic disciplines, have invoked the power of the Fu or HB to their gain: Thurmon Munson, Catfish Hunter, Randy Johnson, Rollie Fingers, Reggie Jackson, Dennis Eckersley (See? They didn't need no stinkin' steroids, they had the stache'), John Newcomb, Dr. J, Dale Earnhart, Joe Namath, Randy White, Kenny Stabler, Ben Davidson (one of my all time favorite football badasses). I could go on and on, but you get the point. Potts was correct to rid himslf of the full-blown beard. Some cool QB's have had beards (Dan Fouts, for example). But the moustache is far preferable as a statement of Potts' "badassedness."

So, there you have it my friends. I was buying into all the preseason predictions that had Tech with an 8 win season, until I saw this:

Again, let me reemphasize, while UT has this:

... Tech has this:

Now I know, a National Championship is all but assured. I can't wait for the season to start.

Enough Already!

2009-02-09T12:32:00.027-06:00

We've all experienced things that start off being kind of amusing but then become old. Examples include that good looking girl you really want to nail but who talks non-stop, or the toddler in the airline seat in front of you who reacts in a funny way when you make the ubiquitous "a-boo" face at him. Know what I mean? After about 10 times, the kid's reaction isn't amusing enough to make you want to keep making a fool of yourself. Nevertheless, the little turd won't stop standing in his seat looking backwards at you. It gets old, real fast. Well, Mike Leach's zany antics are becoming somewhat tiresome to the Spudster.

This "negotiating" crapola has gone on far too long, and I'm leaning toward placing the blame on Leach for the delay. At first, I tended to believe the pro-Leach blather from such reliable sources of information as the Football Board on Scout (yes...that's a joke). What I've heard is that Leach's agent contacted Gerald Myers way back in April seeking to renegotiate and that Myers did not respond at first (bad move), and some time later, when he did respond, he supposedly told the agent "Sorry, but no more money. If he has a better offer elsewhere, well, bye" (worse move). Because I liked Leach, I tended to think any fault was with the administration, whom I figured was trying to be cheapshits in the situation. Now, I'm not so sure. Some of Leach's recent statements to the media, which he claims he does not want involved in the negotiations, but who he still comments to, have me doing a 180.

Right now, I'm pretty pissed at Leach. Of course, I love Tech winning more games than in the past. The fact that he didn't fit the good ol' boy mold was a big plus to me. I thought it was funny when he started the pirate thing. I guffawed (only people over 40 can "guffaw") when he did the TV weatherman bit. His off-the-wall disposition during interviews would sometimes make me cringe a little, but I still snickered. Now, I'm not quite so amused. You'd think after an 11-2 season, I'd be a little more grateful. But here's my problem: my alma mater's team got the crap beat out of them twice on national television. The OU loss, I won't necessarily lay at his feet. But Ole' Miss? That just looked like a situation where the team wasn't ready and Leach just got flat outcoached. What went wrong? I don't know, but maybe Ole' Coach Funnybritches should have been more focused on trying to beat a very good SEC team rather than placing his grill on 60 Minutes or embarking on his annual job hunt. I'm just sayin'.

It's the yearly job hunt that irks me the most. His looking around is as much a surprise as finding a boll weevil in a cotton field. If it's December, Mike's sure to be on the road, seeking another gig. I really can't blame anybody for wanting to improve his lot in life. Who is the Spud to say Mikie shouldn't reach as high as possible in getting his piece of the American dream? But hey, don't screw my school over while doing it. Tech already has to deal with the problem of being behind UT and A&M in several ways, some real and others only perceived. But Leach's yearly cheatin' heart act only serves to advance the concept that Lubbock is only a place you want to be from. It makes Tech look bad. Moreover, it can't help recruiting. At least one kid decided on another school over Tech citing his concern over whether Leach would be there next year. Assistant Coach Seth Littrell, one of Tech's best recruiters, recently announced he was leaving to go to The University of Arizona. Littrell mentioned the uncertainly of the Head Coach position as a factor. Thanks, Mike.

I'm well aware of all the arguments that can be made for him going to some bigger, fancier program. But when one considers Leach and his idiosyncrasies, the conclusion might be reached that he is in the best place possible for him. Leach is unconventional, and Tech pretty much lets him be so. Case in point: Leach reportedly hates alumni relations and fundraising. These are expected duties of a head coach at any big time program. Leach isn't required to do them. It was amusing to hear Leach's name bandied about when the job at Tennessee was open. It is difficult to imagine Leach at a Knoxville fundraiser, allowing himself to be grappled about the shoulders by some big Southern dummy while hearing "This here's gooood people!" I figure Ole' Mike would last about two years in that environment. Besides, Leach doesn't even look "corporate" enough for some big time program. Leach appears like he just got dragged behind a truck driving to the Goodwilll. Can you imagine Pete Carroll walking around his office wearing flip flops? The tobacco road bullshit artist down in Austin may have yellow teeth, but he doesn't walk around looking like a pile of dirty laundry. But Leach gets a pass. He is the King of Lubbock. Ok, there are certainly more prestigious kingdoms, but not many others where there's such a low risk of forced abdication. Leach probably never has to buy a meal, wait in line or fear a DWI. He can say what he wants, do what he wants, dress like he wants, tell the media to pound sand, blow off boosters, whatever suits him. Hell, they don't even make him play defense. Not a bad deal.

One thing that hasn't helped is that Leach employs the services of IMG as his agent. IMG is the Kimbo Slice of sports agencies. This is the same agency that represents such luminaries as Tiger Woods. And reportedly, they've been dealing with Tech as if Leach is Tiger Woods. Seems like you should have to win at least one championship before you get to retain the most obnoxious agents and have them big time people. But hey, as the old punchline goes: "Baby, the doctor say I'm impotent. Well, if you's impotent, you gotta act impotent and look impotent." IMG has done such swell things as contract Tech's Regents directly with offers and counter proposals, intentionally circumventing Hance, Myers and Guy Bailey in the process. Nice. Of course, that galled Myers to no end. The relationship between Myers and Leach has dissolved into something akin to two old ladies swatting each other with their purses in a fight over the contents of the bargain bin.

"How bad you want that buyout now, Mother *#@&er?!?!"

Of course, it's always about money. Reportedly, the school has offered in the neighborhood of $12.7 million over 5 years. The negotiations are allegedly bogged down over such terms as the buyout provision of the contract and the school's desire to terminate for cause if Leach interviews without permission during the life of the contract. The buyout provision is not abnormal, something like $300k per year for any remaining contract year...not particularly onerous. Given Leach's track record of looking around, one can hardly blame the Athletic Office for this figure. The termination for cause for interviewing is pretty harsh and not at all normal. But again, given that Leach is apparently as loyal as a tomcat, I'm not sure I can blame Myers for asking. There's supposedly also some impasse over Leach not wanting to have to answer to Myers, which of course, is downright childish; Myers is the AD for Christsakes. Similarly goofy has been Gerald's "hardball" tactics which would tend to piss off anyone with a modicum of ego. To me, all of this just stinks. What really hacks me off is that because of the delay, if Leach leaves now, our chance of getting a quality replacement is about as good as beating Mark Mangino to the last slice of pie. Thanks again, guys.

Leach has done much for Tech's program. He's brought unprecedented publicity to the school, some of it even good. But he's now doing harm. It maybe asking a little too much, but I'd like to see a little loyalty here, or at least concern from the man for what he's doing to the program and the school as a whole. If he wants to be here, great. Let's get the differences hammered out and the agreement executed. If he doesn't want to be at Tech, he should move it on down the line. Maybe his shtick will play as well elsewhere as it does in Lubbock. Maybe not.

good grief charlie brown

2008-12-10T19:24:00.001-06:00

Heisman Trust = Lucy as the placeholder.

If our QB had USC or Nebraska written across the front of his uniform they would have already mailed the stiffarm trophy to him a week ago.

Ridiculous.

Petition

2008-12-03T19:42:00.003-06:00

(5:45 pm)

Coach,

Why the constant "keeping my options open" behavior? You have repeatedly indicated you want to stay in Lubbock, but hop the next flight to Seattle? I get the whole "I'm a lawyer and this is just part of the business of coaching and negotiations" thing, but it seems like you enjoy twisting our nips a little too much and they're starting to get a little sore and it ain't exciting like it used to be...

I'm in position number one on the bandwagon - always have been - but for all that is still holy could you please turn on your freaking cell phone?

Seems like we're always negotiating in good faith while our partner keeps jerking it to every single December issue of Hustler ever since we got married...it's not helping our already shitty self esteem one single bit.

Now, please stay.

Because we love you.

And we know you beat the shit out of us occasionally, but you make us feel safe...and the offensive explosions are out of this world - occasionally you aren't that into it - but for the most part I look forward to our Saturday nights with lustful abandon...you take us into your arms and tell us how wonderful we are and then you do that thing you do where you throw me all over the place...

Nobody does it just the way you do...

Come back.

I suppose these bruises will heal just like they did last time...

(8:39 pm)

(note: my frustration has led to foul language in this post, if you're up past your bedtime, call your mommy and tell them a bad man on the computer has spoken inappropriately toward you. For our regular readers who may be slightly appalled, I promise I'll go buy Hillsong's new CD right away and repent soon after)

I propose a resolution/petition - sign it if you like...

Resolved,

We the People of Raiderland, in order to form a more perfect fan base, establish 1st tier-e-ness, insure collegiate tranquility, provide for a better defense, promote the genital welfare, and secure the blessings of ftwinity to ourselves and our...well mostly ourselves, do ordain and establish this Petition for the United Commuter Lots of Raiderville....

A petition for Mike Leach to go freeze his balls off in Washington...where it rains all the fucking time and Grey's Anatomy isn't really filmed there.

Or to go to Mississippi State where you can smell the chicken shit all the live long day...cause I don't care what you say that is far more disgusting than the feedlots of Hereford...

And finally, if you're stupid enough to go to Auburn and risk being the next guy on their stupid gay orange and blue carousel, then go be Nick Saban's bitch because I'm sure that will taste so much better than Stoops' ass...

Signed,

Aphrodisiac Jackson, Texas

"Step away from the ledge, Mr. Collier."

2008-11-25T10:48:00.007-06:00

Wow. That really sucked. To be honest, I am not all that surprised that Tech lost. I am surprised by the margin, however. I really thought our boys would give a better accounting of themselves. But hey, anything worth doing is worth doing all the way: if you are going to drop a stink bomb like that, you might as well do it before a nationwide audience on Saturday night. Yep, that was great.

Why was I not all that surprised? Because I am a pessimist by nature. This tendency doesn't serve me well most of the time, but, when things go bad, I am usually less taken aback than the people who always walk around on happy feet. But I must admit, this one hit me hard. I had really started to buy into the hype, feeling like Tech had a legitimate shot at the Big XII title, and who knows, maybe more. I know a Big XII title shot is still theoretically possible, but c’mon: who really believes Okie State will beat the unofficial NFL franchise of Oklahoma?

Because of my pessimistic nature, I prepared for this loss by deciding to avoid watching the game in the company of others, and instead, opted to go it alone. I could tell, by the end of the first quarter, that it was not going to go well. By the middle of the second quarter, I became so distraught, I turned the TV off and retreated outside, where I cracked open a bottle of wine. I dispensed with the fancy glass and, in a scene reminiscent of a 1950’s western, where the bad guys trade whiskey with the Indians, began chugging it straight out of the bottle. But this was a pretty good cabernet, not rotgut. “Hmmm… An amusing little firewater. Presumptuous, yet eminently palatable.” I drank myself into a stupor and quickly fell asleep.

I awoke the next morning with a sense of dread and a terrible hangover. People around me acted as if somebody had died. All the sharp objects had been removed from their usual places of storage. My firearms were hidden away. People kept their distance. I avoided watching any sports-related reporting on television. I didn’t look at the newspaper. I went to the office and logged into the computer, and in a blurb on the MSN web browser, I saw the score. Holy shit.

My mind sort of went haywire. This couldn’t be. How could they blow it that badly? I ran into some doofus later, one of those “zippiddy do dah” sunshine pumpers; he is the type who, even under normal circumstances, makes me want to kick the stuffing out of him. He wanted to talk with me about the game. He tried to convince me that it wasn’t all that bad. He is now buried beneath the floor in my onion cellar.

However, time does heal all wounds. Well, at least it helps abate the hangover from drinking a full bottle of Franciscan. Discussions with people much better adjusted than I am (that covers pretty much everybody), including my fellow scribes on this blog, have helped me see that it’s not the end of the world. I’ve managed to cobble together a few seemingly healthy rationalizations why:

1. I can quit sweating it. I’ve been fretting this all season; this game I mean. At the beginning, I said if we could go 10-2, I’d be pretty happy. I always figured the game in Norman would be one of those losses, with another thrown in just to satisfy my pessimistic side. Now, I can quit worrying about it.
2. We’re 10-1, with a decent shot at going 11-1. If you’d told me that at the beginning of the season, I’d have been thrilled.
3. Just a bad day? I’m still convinced that Tech is not as bad as they looked on Saturday. This was, as I see it, one of those “perfect storm” things. There were a lot of things lining up that made this outcome occur. It was in Norman, always a tough place to play. Stoops may be a turd, but he can coach and he can damned sure motivate his players. He knew he’d need to turn Tech into a greasy spot to make a statement for the pollsters. His players were still pissed from last year. Plus, our guys just did not seem to have the intensity they had against UT or OSU. I’m not sure any level of play by Tech could have overcome the OU steamroller last Saturday, but I suspect the lopsided score wouldn’t have been quite so, well, lopsided, had Tech not been flat.
4. Hey, blowouts can happen to anybody. Tech did it to Kansas this year. To OSU too. UT got blown out by OU by 52 points just 5 years ago, and by 49 points a few years before that. The folks who dealt Tech this butt kicking got beat pretty bad by USC in the Orange Bowl a few years back. It happens. It sucks when it does, but, it happens.
5. Maybe we get to keep Cap’n Mike. One of my other things to sweat was, and is, Coach Leach leaving us for another, bigger school. Face it, before this loss, most of the talk was about him hauling ass. The humble folks from Tennessee kept posting on their Scout board that Leach was already as good as there, that they “could have him if they want him” and that nobody would choose Lubbock over Knoxville. I never really thought Leach would be a good fit there, if, for no other reason, that I don’t think he’d want to be at a school with a double negative in its fight song. Still, the talk caused such trepidation that people started websites to collect funds to bribe him to stay. I hear somebody started trying to erect a faux mountain near his home to try to combat the “flat Lubbock" vs. “we got mountains” swill the Tennessee people kept spouting. To this end, somebody managed to pile up 30 feet of cottonseed hulls in his backyard by the time of Saturday’s whuppin. Now, it’s not that I think Coach Leach isn’t going to be sought after anymore, because I know better. He’s the most innovative coach in the country, and he will surely still be wooed. However, he may not seem quite so bootylicious now. Let’s face it: all the Simonize, buffing and elbow grease in the world can’t put a shine on the turd Mike’s team laid in Norman last Saturday. Maybe he’s less of a hot commodity now. More importantly, however, maybe this will make him want to stay and prove this blowout was a fluke.
6. At least the Tech game had implications. Not all that long ago, we’d have been at 5 & 5 and coming down to the wire needing a win just to get into some crappy bowl. The fact that Tech was in a game of this magnitude means that the program is progressing. You’ve got to go through stuff like this to get to the promised land. As I’ve heard a lot of people who should know say, it takes a lot of talent and more than a little luck to get to a national championship. Any good team can have setbacks (see above). Tech now has to show it has the character to put this loss behind them and keep moving on. I think they can, and I think there is nobody better situated to do this than Coach Leach.
7. This loss can be liberating. A guy I sort of know suggested this, and he’s smarter than me (that’s damning him with faint praise, but he really does know something). He’s right: I can have my life back. I gotta be honest…I was getting a little obsessed there. As each win was amassed, I’d get more and more wound up. I kept bargaining, making all sorts of crazy deals. Heck, I even promised to get my tax returns done “early” if we could just win the Nebraska game. Tech won, and a deal is a deal-I got them in on October 14, a full day early. It was unprecedented. The cost of these bargains kept going up. At one point, I almost said “If we can just beat Texas, I’ll…I’ll, well…I’ll stop drinking!” Note that I wrote “almost.” Come, on, who are we kidding here? I love Tech and all, but let’s be reasonable. I offered up a garage cleaning instead. As the season progressed, things started getting downright scary. I even said I’d be willing to give up some somewhat unnecessary bodily appendage if Tech could just beat OU in Norman. I settled on my pinkie toe. I guess it’s a good thing we lost. I need that pinkie toe for balance on my follow through. Now that we’ve lost, life can settle down a bit. I can quit playing The Matador Song on my ipod, my dog can take off the little TT t-shirt I’ve been making him wear, and I get to keep my body parts. It’s all good.
8. There’s still some ball left to play. Tech can still make a good showing against Baylor, I hope, and maybe go to a decent bowl game and do well. It’s looking like the Cotton Bowl, which is a bit of a disappointment given our earlier ambitions. But hey, at least it’s a New Year’s Day Bowl, and moreover, I’ll save on travel costs. Sure would have liked to see Miami or Phoenix, though. However, in the back of my mind, I’m still hoping for a minor miracle in Stillwater (See? I’m not a complete pessimist.)

So, you see, it’s not the end of the world. Things could be worse. Life has its setbacks. We all have them, and this is how it goes. If these reasons aren’t good enough for you, there is always one more thing you can consider. The one thing that I always find consoling, and I bet it works for you, too: At least we’re not Aggy.

5th and inches - Week 13

2008-11-20T15:08:00.003-06:00

A 6-5 week ATS last week, 11-1 straight up winners/losers. For the year now, 83-56-1 ATS and 122-33 straight up. It's a huge week in the Big 12, here's hoping we can all make it the last 48 hours to kickoff.

**Thursday**

#23 Miami (ESPN HD) @ Georgia Tech (3') - Miami takes to the Thursday night air for the 2nd straight week in pursuit of the conference that no one really seems to want. Carolina's had the inside track in their division, but can't close the deal. Virginia Tech's faltered when they had a chance to grab control. And now there's Miami, with a loss to Carolina, but a win last week over Va. Tech, and now they hit the road to Ga. Tech, which may throw the ball 10 times a game. I think it's another low-scoring game with lots of defense, which makes covering more than a field goal tough to do. Somewhere in there, someone has to wrap up their spot in the ACC, and I think Miami can take a big step to that tonight. Miami...18-14.

**Saturday**

#2 Texas Tech (ABC HD) @ #5 Oklahoma (7) - I heard somewhere that this game is important. Frankly, I needed the off week last week as much as either team did. Both offenses are flying, both defenses a little bit suspect, in so much as neither fan base thinks the opposing defense will stop their afore-mentioned flying offense. What Sooner fans don't want you to know is that they haven't really been able to beat Tech the way they want to. After Taurean Henderson scored to beat OU on the final play of the game in '05, SoonerFan promised that Tech would be beaten so badly in Norman the next year that they might actually be killed. Instead, OU found themselves down at the half and had to survive with a late TD to win 34-24. Hell, even the goofy Sonny Cumbie team lost 28-13 in Norman. Hardly the zillion-to-3 score that's predicted North of the Red River.

Look, bottom line is this. Both teams will move the ball, and both teams will score. Can Tech win in Norman? Sure. Could they lose by 3 TDs? Sure. That's just kinda how this football game is. But I don't see the latter happening. And if it's going to be close, as I said for the Texas game, may as well take Tech to win it outright. Tech...41-38.

Iowa State @ Kansas State (10) - Ron Prince is on his way out. Iowa State is playing better. I wouldn't be surprised if the 'Clones can find a way to win here. KState...38-30.

Syracuse (NBC HD) @ Notre Dame (20) - Greg Robinson is out at Syracuse, and Charlie Weis is on various hot seats, while others claim that's not true. Regardless, it'd better be a big seat. Notre Dame...34-10.

NC State (Raycom HD) @ #22 N. Carolina (11) - It's Rivalry Week, at least that's what ESPN keeps telling me. This is usually a good candidate for a real brawl of a game, but State's been hard to figure out this year. Carolina, home after a tough loss @ Maryland, can keep themselves in the ACC mix with a win, which I think they will. Carolina...27-17.

Michigan (ABC HD) @ #10 Ohio State (20') - Never thought I'd see this game with a 3TD line on it. Never thought I'd take it, either. Ohio State...35-14.

#15 Michigan State (ABC/ESPN2) @ #8 Penn State (14') - The Sparties are hard to figure, beating a bad Michigan team in the closing minutes, bombed by Ohio State at home, trounced Northwestern at NW. Here, they get Penn State to close Penn State's season. Penn State...31-13.

#14 BYU (The Mountain HD) @ #7 Utah (6') - Utah tries to keep their BCS hopes alive. Should be a pretty entertaining game, if you can see it. BYU...34-31.

#20 Pitt (ESPN2 HD) @ #19 Cincinnati (5') - Another Top 25 matchup here. I think it's close and decided late. Cincinnati...31-24.

Florida State (ESPN HD) @ #25 Maryland (1') - Florida State is a bit dinged on defense after losing a player after Darius McClure hurt himself while celebrating an interception. I like the speed of FSU here, even if they're not in warm Florida. FSU...23-20.

Boston College (ABC/ESPN2) @ Wake Forest (2) - The BC "D" is the difference here. Boston College...19-17.

Army (ESPN Plus) @ Rutgers (17') - Tough to like anyone by more than 3 scores against Army. Rutgers...27-20.

the hype is killing me

2008-11-19T18:17:00.004-06:00

OMG.

ESPN, please stop it already. My stomach already churns all day. And the work is piling up on my desk because every time I turn around I get an e-mail from a Tech buddy that has a link to a story or a video that I've already read or seen about 4 times.

Did you know Leach was the subject of an article in The New York Times Magazine by Michael Lewis? And then the NYTM did a follow-up interview with Lewis and Lewis still thinks we're David and UT and OU are Goliath? And that OU is favored by 6.5 to 7 and that Bob Stoops never loses in Norman, unless you count all the times he's lost to UT in Dallas?

I'm terribly grateful for all of the great pub TTU is getting, though - for years we've strolled along in relative anonymity - and so it's cool to see Tom Rinaldi reporting from AT&T Jones Stadium like he's doing pregame for the next Indy @ New England showdown. I'm like a kid in a candy store here.

To be able to have conversations with fellow college football fans and have them congratulate me on a great season, like I did anything to contribute to it....well....there was that time I puked in the bushes outside the auditorium after the Nebraska game, but I'm betting that doesn't count.

So for all of you struggling to make time go by a little quicker, a prayer...

God grant me the serenity
to reject the fact that ESPN is attempting to control my mind and wallet;
the courage to tell that OU alumnus that he's a dickweed;
and the wisdom to go to Baylor.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time until kickoff, so I can start binge drinking again;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to onesinglesolitarybig12titleisthattoofreakingmuchtoask;
Taking as He did, this world full of Colorado fans
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to Erin Andrews;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with a BCS title
Forever and ever,

Amen.

All apologies to Jesus and such...

but can we get to kickoff already?

BREAKING NEWS OUT OF LUBBOCK!

2008-11-19T10:16:00.005-06:00

(Lubbock, TX) Sources close to the Texas Tech Athletic Department said Wednesday that Mike Leach has been named as the replacement for Mike Leach when he inevitably leaves the program.

This news comes before the biggest game in the history of this year as the 10-0 Red Raiders get ready for a showdown with 9-1 Oklahoma in Norman Saturday.

"Well, we just want to make sure no stone is left unturned," Gerald Myers, Texas Tech Athletic Director said. "We all know Mike, and Mike is going to do what Mike is going to do. So we thought it best that he replaces himself at some point."

Speculation across the nation is that some top programs like Tennesssee, Washington, and Syracuse are all interested in the Texas Tech coach to come lead their program and not be too weird, an unnamed source said.

"Well, I'm just focused on us getting better each week and getting ready for OU," Leach said. "It's an honor to be named the head coach designate here, and I just saw in the news that a baby hippopotamus was born at a zoo in Switzerland. I was at a zoo in Switzerland this summer. You know the interesting deal about hippopotami and whales evolved from the same prehistoric animal. It's, uh, kind of a neat deal though that they just like to spend their days wallowing around in the mud, which doesn't make them much different than some other animal characters you'll find. Like a pig."

5th and inches - Week 12

2008-11-13T15:40:00.004-06:00

A so-so 8-7 week against the line last week...11-4 straight up. Season totals now stand at 77-51-1 ATS and 111-32 SU. Tech gets a BYE this week and frankly, as alums and fans, we need it. Should be a great weekend for the footballs next weekend, but in the meantime, we've got your Thursday/Saturday slate ready to go.

**Thursday**

Virginia Tech (ESPN HD) @ Miami (5) - Some Thursday night football as the wacky ACC season winds down. As of this morning, I think 2 teams are out of contention. Everyone else is still alive. Low scoring affair in Miami tonight, I'd think, and could likely swing on a big special teams play from someone. Miami...24-20.

**Saturday**

#3 Texas (13) @ Kansas (FSN HD) - Texas has a recent history of struggling in late-season roadies...and this one is supposed to be fairly cold...at least if you listen to Austin radio this week. Muddying the picture somewhat is that Texas lost their backup center to an ill-advised Facebook posting, then lost their starting center to an ill-advised knee injury in practice. So it's a freshman at center and I think lots of shotgun snappage. Still, Kansas can't stop anyone and that doesn't bode well for them, Senior Day or not. Texas...38-20.

Texas A&M @ Baylor (8) - This one would be fun to watch, but we don't get to see it. Baylor, a TD+ favorite deep in the Big 12 season. You'd have to go back to the late 90s for some of that action. Baylor may win, but I think it's a 4th-quarter game, to go cliche on you. Baylor...34-31.

#12 Mizzou (27') @ Iowa State (FSN HD) - Mizzou roared out quick last week, then kinda went cruise control on us and shut it down and didn't cover. 4 TDs is a big number, but 'Zou has a chance to really sew up the North here. I don't think they let up this week. Mizzou...44-20.

#13 OK State (17) @ Colorado (ABC HD) - We'll see how quickly OSU can turn around after a drubbing, especially in the 2nd of 2 straight on the road. I have a sneaking suspicion this one is closer than the number. OK State...30-21.

Nebraska (7) @ Kansas State (FSN PPV) - I like the Children of the Corn here. KSU has fired their coach, recruits are switching commits, it's a full-on party in Manhattan right now. Nebraska...34-17.

Northwestern (ESPN2 HD) @ Michigan (4) - Hard to believe saying something "Man, what a big road win @ Minnesota for Michigan," but that's what it was. Michigan...23-14.

Notre Dame (3') @ NAVY (CBS HD) - Navy snapped like a forever-long losing streak to the Irish last year. I think they'll start a new one this week. Notre Dame...27-20.

SMU @ UTEP (9') - In this week's Coin Flip Pick o' the Week, I'll take Potpourri for $600. UTEP...38-34.

Mississippi State (ESPN HD) @ #1 Alabama (20) - Intriguing game here, with 'Bama coming home off the OT road win @ LSU. Miss State has won 2 straight over the Tide, and I think hasn't allowed an offensive TD in either game. Or something like that. State still can't score, and the Tide doesn't exactly score 5 TDS a game. So laying 20 is kinda tough to do. Alabama...27-10.

#25 South Carolina (CBS HD) @ #4 Florida (21) - Another great one here, with Spurrier heading back to Florida. The media wants Florida in the BCS title game so badly they can taste it. Florida wins...but closer than the experts think, as Corso would say, whatever that means, being that he's supposedly an expert or something. So does that mean if he thinks it's close, and then it's supposed to be closer than close, could it actually wind up in negatives? Florida...29-14.

#16 North Carolina (2') @ Maryland (ABC) - Interesting Maryland team, coming home of a road loss and getting a ranked Carolina team in search of a possible BCS date down the road. The line is close and the game should be close as well. Maryland...21-20.

Smack Attack

2008-11-13T10:16:00.006-06:00

These are the salad days my friends. Actually, they’re more like the strip steak at Ruth’s Chris days. After years of hitting the buffet at Sizzler, we finally have a shot at the big time (the theme song from The Jeffersons just popped into my head). This is uncharted territory for many of us old timers, who suffered through years of 6&6 or 7&5 seasons, just hoping for an invitation to the Odoreaters Bowl in Paducah, Ky. on Dec. 10th. ( “Hey, are you going to the bowl game?” “Naw, I gotta clean the gutters.” "Going to watch it on tv? It's going to be on channel 87 at 2:00 a.m." "Nope. Gutters." ).

These unusual times have resulted in some unusual behavior for me. I find myself lingering around the doors of my fellow office workers who are UT grads talking college football. I no longer have to endure listening to them drone on and on about their wealth of talent and the all but assured shot they will have at the National Championship, with their occasional condescending acknowledgement of Tech’s good performance on Saturday against Northbynorthwest Polytech and Tech’s “spunky little running back who we looked at but passed up for Ricky Williams/Earl Campbell/Vince Young/Superman.” Even those arrogant clowns are having to acknowledge Tech as a legitimate contender. Scoreboard, baby. I find myself buying more and more stuff with a double T on it (I even bought my schnauzer a TT t shirt-don’t worry, he smells better than most t shirt fans).

One thing that is unusual for me is the fact I am spending more time on college football message boards. It's not that I haven't spent any time on them, because I have. But I am spending much more time reading them, when I should be doing meaningful stuff like billing hours, representing my client's interests and important crap like that (“Sorry Mr. Nusbaum, that $2,200,000.00 lawsuit will have to wait.”). I can’t help myself. Since I have been reading them so much throughout this season, I have detected certain patterns in the posts from our opponents that is growing rather tiresome. As a public service and a courtesy to our opponents, I thought I might summarize and categorize the aforementioned tiresome smack, and hopefully, save the folks at OU and Baylor the trouble.

1. “Tech Sucks”: We know, we know, you hate us, don’t respect us, etc. Fine by us…we’ll live. This category of smack ranges from the incredibly astute observation that Lubbock is flat (it is), to the claim that all of our coeds have sexually transmitted diseases (they don’t, at least not before I met them). Probably the most tiresome smack of this genre involves the fiction that people only go to Tech because they couldn’t gain admission to UT or A&M. This is a waste of time, fellow opponents, because it is not the truth. In fact, most of us never even applied to UT or A&M. In fact, we didn’t even “apply” to Tech. Most of us were actually given a choice by the tribunal of the relevant jurisdiction between going to prison, joining the Merchant Marine, or enrolling at Tech. I really thought about the Merchant Marine because I wanted to “see the World,” but Tech had better weed. Seriously, though, these claims don’t bother me. Hinging your self-worth on the approval of an Aggie or Longhorn is a risky proposition, and is akin to a wino seeking the approval of a crack whore.
2. “Tech Fans Are Thugs”: I never realized I was such a badass. Sure, I’ll knock a grandmother out of her wheelchair to steal her Social Security check. Hey, let’s not get judgmental here; have you seen the price of bourbon lately? Our opponents have us doing all types of deviltry to them when they visit the Jones, what with our hurling all manner of objects at them: batteries, foodstuffs, goalposts, pit bulls, nuclear waste, etc. You name it, we throw it. I really didn’t think these claims were true, because I haven’t witnessed this kind of stuff. But that’s probably because I’m busy outside the stadium selling government secrets to terrorists or ramming my heavy toed jackboot into the ribs of a third grader. So, I looked it up, and you know what? They’re right! I found that our not-so-esteemed alumni include Al Capone, Adolph Eichmann (he was low grade Tech scum, but Hitler was able to get into UT because he was real smart and all), Jeffrey Dahmer, Pol Pot (M.Ed.), John Hinkley, Rosie Ruiz, and the guy who invented “Clackers.” Worst of all, John Denver went there too. Given this, we’ll save you OU and Baylor folks the trouble and admit that we’re trash. Just plain old trash. Plain old 10-0 trash. Go tell somebody who gives a damn.

Note the color he's wearing. He looked better in scarlet. WRECK EM'!

3. “Tech’s ‘Gimmicky’ Offense”: Ok by me. It’s different, that’s for sure. The main difference? We’re winning. Tech finally has some semblance of a running game to help balance things out. Plus, they're playing some defense, so they're not losing the games they typically would in the pure “shoot out” days. Call it gimmicky if you like, but it’s fun to watch. You know, a few weeks ago, I tried to watch Penn State play Ohio State. I thought to myself “Let me see some real football. Some of that smash mouth, 3 plays - 9 yards and a cloud of dust stuff from the leather helmet days.” I switched the TV to some shopping channel after 30 minutes. I kept getting distracted by the lint in my belly button. By the way, I got a great deal on a blackjack and a pair of brass knuckles on QVC.
4. “Tech has no National Championships.” Our opponents like to remind us of this. A lot. Well, the UT folks like to, because they have several. I figure the OU folks might be laying this one on us soon, because they have a stinkload of them. Acknowledged. But don’t waste your time. This is a little like telling me your triple great grandmother came over on the Mayflower. What good is that going to do you now? I will admit, however, the Aggie smack in this regard is amusing, because they like to tell us about their National Championship. Note the singular, not plural, word at the end of the preceding sentence. It happened a long time ago. A very long time ago. Given the lack of temporal relevancy, this reminds me of my grandfather telling me about how, in his day, for just a nickel, you could get a hamburger, a “malted milk,” and a big house in Highland Park.
So, there you have it. Look what I’ve done for you! I’ve saved you time and innumerable keystrokes. We’ve heard it all, so don’t bother. Is there a way I can bill for this? I thought not.

5th and inches - Week 11

2008-11-07T15:32:00.003-06:00

Muy mucho apologies for missing the picks the last couple of weeks. I sent them out in the weekly e-mail last week, but forgot to put them here. I went 7-7, did have the Tech win at 42-40...yearly totals are 69-44-1 ATS and 100-28 on straight up winners and losers. Again, sorry, but we're back this week, so blog me.

**Saturday**

#9 OK State (ABC HD) @ #2 Texas Tech (3) - Another night in The Jones as the Cowboys come calling. Most of the national pundits this week feel like there's no way Tech can get back up after last week's performance. OK State, meanwhile, definitely a good football team. But supposedly they've gotten 1,000 times better than the other OK State teams that have repeatedly been torched by Tech's offense, and run the ball better than anyone Tech has played, which is something they've already done successfully against Tech for years. So basically, there's nothing in this year's matchup that's new to the matchup...minus the Top 10 rankings for both. At home, probably reminded a zillion times this week of last year's game in Stillwater, I'll take Tech...41-30.

Baylor (FSN HD) @ #4 Texas (26) - Baylor continues to get better and better behind Robert Griffin at QB. He'll have his hands full in Austin, however, as the 'Horns come home after a tough loss in Lubbock last week. Texas has some key people banged up, but I don't suspect that will make much difference. It's close early, I think, and 26 is a lot to lay for a team coming off an emotional loss. But I think Texas grinds it out to the number. Texas...44-14.

#6 Oklahoma (25') @ Texas A&M (ABC) - A&M hasn't stopped much of anyone this year, even in their wins. Speaking of wins, they've got 2 in a row now. But here comes Oklahoma, which scored last week at the rate of an earlier-in-the-2000s Paris Hilton. I like Jarrod Johnson at QB for A&M, but I don't think they have enough weapons to keep this one close. OU...45-21.

Kansas State (FSN HD) @ #14 Mizzou (26') - Wow. If there was ever a recipe for a team to get piledriven into oblivion, this is it. KState can't stop anyone on defense, Mizzou can get it rolling on offense, and now KState has a lame duck coach for the rest of the year. Mizzou...49-20.

Kansas (1') @ Nebraska (FSN PPV) - The biggest thing to say about this game, honestly, is pay back. Both teams put up a ton of points last year in Lawrence, when Kansas won like 69-42 or something like that. NU is coming home off the blowout loss in Norman, KU off the big win over intra-state rival Kansas State. Nebraska...30-28.

Iowa State (Versus) @ Colorado (9') - I'm not sure how either one of these teams gives the other 9 1/2 points, at this point. Colorado...30-17.

#20 Georgia Tech (Raycom HD) @ #19 North Carolina (4') - The only reason I like Carolina here is because they're at home. This ought to be a pretty good football game. Carolina...24-17.

Memphis (2') @ SMU - Heck, at 2 and a hook, live a little and run Purina. Or is it Peruna? SMU...33-30.

Michigan (ESPN HD) @ Minnesota (8) - I'm guessing that Minnesota won't be throwing it up late this week if it's tied and they're at their 20. Minnesota...23-20.

Notre Dame (ESPN HD) @ Boston College (3) - No feel for this game at all. Which typically means the Irish win when the opposing team's kicker is distracted by a guy in a Chewbacca costume in the end zone as he's lining for the gamer and doinks it into the band. ND...24-22.

Army @ Rice (9) - Army's really been salty of late...but I think Rice can put up the points. Rice...38-27.

#3 Penn State (7') @ Iowa (ABC) - Iowa was cruising toward an upset pick here 'til last weekend. Not sure what to make of them now. Penn State trying to stay in the BCS race, Iowa trying to bounce back from a road loss.........Penn State...17-13.

#1 Alabama (4) @ #16 LSU (CBS HD) - Lots of defense on display here Saturday night, but I think 'Bama has the better one. Do not be surprised if something wacky happens late in this one to give the Tigers the win, with all the subplots around Nick Saban's return and all of that...but I think 'Bama is the better team and is proven already in hostile territory. Alabama...23-17.

#21 Cal (ABC HD) @ #7 USC (18') - Huge number in this one. Cal got a big win over a ranked Oregon team last week, now has to go on the road to top 10 USC. Cal's played the spoiler here before, so I don't think USC will get caught unawares. But still, I think it should be closer than the number. USC...34-21.

#11 Ohio State (11) @ #24 Northwestern (ESPN2 HD) - Northwestern home off the big pick 6 in the waning moments to win on the road. I don't think that helps them here. OSU...31-14.

holy crap this is funny

2008-11-03T06:33:00.001-06:00

More funny videos from the "ryanparkersongs's channel" channel at Heavy.com

Just got back in town

2008-11-02T20:06:00.003-06:00

I'll be there

2008-10-29T21:24:00.003-05:00

So you know - Bond J Bond/Aphrodisiac Jackson will be in the LBK for "the" game.

First game I've attended in Lubbock (that's a qualifier because I've been to a few bowl games) since I GRADUATED! Holy crap that's a long time.

Bought the tickets before the season started (thank you Red Raider Club) because I also have a family function on Friday night...I had no idea that the value of my tickets would appreciate FAR faster than any stock I've ever owned...geez.

The Head Coach was on Dan Patrick's radio program today, by the way...pretty awesome interview.

So if you see a great lookin' drunk white guy wearing a black T-Shirt that says "Texas Tech" emblazoned across the front - well - that could be me!

Gotta go pack - see you soon, fellas...

a few thoughts from a fan

2008-10-27T19:31:00.002-05:00

I've waited 35 years for Saturday night.

To put that in a little perspective...

I only had to wait 22 years to meet the woman I would marry and have a child with.

I'm pretty sure there's a large group of folks that can say they've waited a hell of a lot longer for their spouse and for this weekend's football dream matchup. So let's just say that this weekend is big. Really big.

If Tech were somehow to lose the game, I just want all of y'all to remember that the season isn't over - that group of guys has more than delivered for us already this year.

Enough of that negative talk, though...

I'm comforted that the Austin sports radio stations and national media have revealed unintentionally that they haven't watched a single Tech Football game this season. Because this team is different, so all of those folks who keep spouting off the same old Tech cliche's (no running game, no defense, weak schedule, gimmick offense, system quarterback, treeless sand dune landscape, etc etc) are only making themselves to look ignorant to the truth.

Regarding the Defense:

Spare me your "Tech is only the 58th best defense in the country" because I'll note that UT is ranked #44 and gives up only 12 yards less per game than does TTU. Please.

Tech is 10th in turnover margin @ +9 (So is OU - see how that helped them in their big game against the Longhorns?)

Tech is 21st in 3rd down conversions allowed - only allowing 32%, Texas is WAY down the list at 47th - but only allow 36%.

Pass defenses between the two units are slight as well, btw - UT allows 265 ypg via the air and Tech 245 ypg.

Texas is so AWESOME on the ground! 183 ypg! Let me tell you what - you'd better be - if you're not going to throw the ball as much as Tech is - you'd better run the ball well - in fact, I'd venture to guess you'd want more than a 45 yard per game average on the ground (Tech runs at 138 ypg).

So spare me your weak stats comparisons - the differences are slight at best.

Coming into the season Tech fans were hungry to play UT because "this could be the year" we could beat them. After all, they had to come to our place and in the preseason even UT was worried about their young secondary and a lack of a pure RB. And so, of course, UT is ranked #1 in the country.... lol ... once again, college football demonstrates its singular awesomeness through its sheer lack of predictability.

Tech is not at all unlike the black sheep of the big state university systems (although the U of H system would quickly disagree). And so having ESPN College Gameday come to Lubbock is not at all unlike having the Griswolds come to Cousin Eddie's for the holidays.

Except that we live in a pretty nice subdivision - and we're going to get to show off our version of how the other side lives on Saturday.

We hope you enjoy our company this weekend, we'll likely only remember parts of your visit. But I can assure you we'll remember the part where we light up the Christmas Tree with TDs.

Ruff Treatment

2008-10-26T17:03:00.007-05:00

Well, well, well…that was fun, wasn’t it? That’s what I’ve been waiting for all year…a good ol’ Tech butt whuppin’. While I was happy for it, I’m kind of sad it came at the expense of Kansas. I’d have much rather seen this come at the expense of Aggy or you know who down in Austin. I just don’t have anything against Kansas or its fans. I’ve had to travel to Kansas a lot and spent a good deal of time there in my work, and I’ve never failed to find the people up there to be anything but friendly and good natured folks—except for this one plaintiff I went up there to depose who threatened to throw me down a flight of stairs. But he was from Missouri anyway.

What made this game so fun were the facts that the outcome didn’t ever really seem in doubt and our defense played well throughout the game. It was just “fun,” and I wasn’t kicked out of the family room for having angst induced grand mals in front of the kids (my anxiety sometimes gets the better of me, manifesting itself in shrieking, beer spitting and inanimate object kicking). But you have to cut me some slack – I’m a product of Texas Tech football circa 1979 through 1983. You know: the "12,000 in the stands- 'Rocket' Ron Reeves turf skipping incomplete pass- couldn’t beat Rice -Rex got on the wrong plane-gawddamned SMU lateral on the kickoff" era of Texas Tech football. While I may not agree with all the observations of my esteemed fellow scribe on this blog when it comes to Spike Dykes, I’ll be the first to say that Leach is a Godsend. Crazy? Well maybe so…Give me crazy over a sane loser any day. A drunk? Fine by me…Drinks are on us, Mike. A lawyer?…Well, what can I say?

But one of the things I love about Leach is that he put Ruffin McNeil in charge of the defense. I love this guy! At one point relatively late in the game, when the win was well in hand, Kansas began moving the ball. Ruff calls the guys over during a time out and he’s so worked up, HE’S SPITTING WHEN HE’S YELLING AT THEM! You gotta love a spitter! That’s what I wanna see…a guy who doesn’t want the other team to score even if the game is in the bag. Beats that “bend but don’t break” crap an day. "Patooey! Get yo' butt out there and tackle!"

Of course, our happiness must be tempered by what’s to come. Tech now has to face the Evil Empire. I really don’t hate UT like I do Aggy. I know a lot of UT grads who are decent guys to have a beer with. But that arrogance is always there, you can just sense it. Well, I suppose they have the right to be arrogant: they have several national championships, as compared to our, well... zero national championships. And, unlike our insane, delusional Maroon wearing friends, their last NC didn’t come from the leather helmet wearing “24…87…36…hike, hike, hike!” days. Face it, we'll probably always be in their shadow. Their coach is a grandfatherly good ol' boy. Tech's coach is a loco, pirate-loving lawyer. They play in a 100,000 seat stadium. Tech is hoping to get the Jones to 65,000 with a planned addition. They have so many blue chip recruits, they don't know what to do with them all. Tech has a kicker recruited from the Lynnewood apartment complex half time kick-o-rama. So what? He did go 9 for 9. I don't care about any of it...it's part of being a Tech alum. We're strange, but hey, we're fun to be around.

Tech's offense is firing on all cylinders now, so it should be able to score. It’s Coach Ruff and his slobber inducing D we need. The Furby-resembling quarterback for UT is completing passes at a percentage that is simply too good to believe. Shipley and Cosby are running wild. UT is playing scary good right now. Texas is supremely confident they will beat Tech. When UT defensive tackle Roy Miller heard about the 63 points Tech hung on Kansas, he only said “Well, we’re not Kansas.” Of course you’re not Roy. People in Kansas aren’t arrogant turds. OU felt pretty confident coming into Lubbock last year. I am hoping Coach Ruff and his boys can administer a dose of humility.

P.S. What say we all chip in and but Jon Bible a two week ticket to Hawaii or someplace?

A Clockwork Maroon

2008-10-22T18:43:00.002-05:00

It was a lovely Friday afternoon, Brothers, when my mates and I left Lubby-Cock to travel to the Harvard on the Brazos for a bit of fun. Me droogs, Mike, Zach and John, loaded into the Durango. A quick stop at Wally Wally Mart for a load of C cells, a whip through the Korova for one for the road, and we were off! Our sad little third tier trade school withered away in the rearview as the Durango purred away a real horror show - a nice, warm vibraty feeling all through your guttiwuts. And soon it was trees and dark, my brothers, with real country dark.. Oh, the anticipation of it all ! A scrap with our greatest one- sided and most self possessed rivals! The thought made me shiver like the rippling of a spastic colon passing an Allsup’s burro-toro. A fair balance of the Ultra violence was afoot, and with a little luck, maybe we’d come upon the opportunity for a little of the old in-out.

After some time, we stopped at a diner in a peaceful little burg. It was a pretty little place, with the name The Green Frog. Mike, John and me-self went in for a quick spot of joe while Zach stayed outside stomping a small kitten to death. “Good evening gentlemen, what’ll you have?” asked the olden heifer behind the counter. “Eggiwegs”, says I, “if you please.” My droogs had the same, with waffles. Mike loosened the lid off the salt shaker so it would dump on some poor, unsuspecting wag’s steakiwegs as I spit into the ketchup bottle. As we were departing the fine eatery, I spotted a poor derelict snoozing away in a boozy dream state by the Bubbly-Wumpster. One thing I could never stand to see was a filthy, dirty old drunkie, howling away with “The Eyes of Texas” and going blurp blurp in between as it might be a filthy old orchestra in his stinking, rotten guts. I could never stand to see anyone like that, whatever his age might be, but more especially when he was real old like this one was. A few swift kicks with the old jackboot and the old bugger was moaning in pain. Johnny boy helped rinse the blood off of the withered coot's face with a good, strong stream of piss. We quite enjoyed our stop. But away!

We made slow progress way to land of the collie, what with having to slow down to try to hit the stray dogs in the road and with Mike wanting to stop and set fire to every crop we passed. John had a lovely time turning over the gravestones in a historic cemetery. We finally rolled in to town at 9 a.m. We were all feeling a bit shagged and fagged and fashed, it being a night of no small expenditure. Still, we were not too tired for a bit of the old in-out. What we were after now was the old surprise visit. That was a real kick and good for laughs and lashings of the old ultraviolent. We spied a young ladies’ dormitory. We approached and I knocked on a door. “Excuse me, Miss. Can you please help? There's been a terrible accident! My friend's in the middle of the road bleeding to death! Can I please use your telephone for an ambulance?” “ Well, I don’t know…” she says, eyeing the double T’s on me smock. ” Missus! It's a matter of life and death!” She foolishly unlached the chain, and we were win-win in the inn! The first thing that flashed into my gulliver was that I'd like to have her right down there on the floor with the old in-out, real savage. Me mates followed right along. It was rape, rape and more rape, except for Mikie-boy, who toddled off to poison the local water supply.

We neared the destination around 11:00. What do we see but a contingent from the local academic collective, all dressed in the flowery maroon of their pride and joy. Classy they were. Classy, and quite, quite hospitable. “Howdy!” they cried, “Howdy and welcome!” One of them handed me a small white souvenir towel. “We’re glad you’re here!” So nice and welcoming they were! I smiled a gleeful, wicked smile, and said “You know what you can do with that towel? Stick it up our arse! Lets get em’ boys!” Ahhh, my Brothers, we made quick work of them, we did. We beat and raped and beat some more, till' there was no one left to flog. Zach wandered off to loot the local food bank.

Dear Brothers, the next few hours were spent in joyful bliss. Batteries were hurled, along with insults and goodly amount of saliva and profanity. I pissey-wissed in a lemonade dispenser while Mike went to set fire to the nearest day care center. Oh bliss! Bliss and heaven! Oh, it was gorgeousness and gorgeousity made flesh. It was like a bird of rarest-spun heaven metal or like silvery wine flowing in a spaceship, gravity all nonsense now. It had been a wonderful day and what I needed now, to give it the perfect ending, was a little of the Ludwig Van. But all I could hear was the theme from Patton! Suddenly, I viddied what I had to do, and what I had wanted to do, and that was to do myself in; to snuff it, to blast off forever out of this wicked, cruel world. One moment of pain perhaps and, then, sleep forever, and ever and ever. Never to hear the theme from Patton again!!! But, dear reader, I couldn’t take myself past the brink. There was simply too much pain to inflict and classlessness to display yet in my life. I girded up and carried on.

It had been a long day. We had exhausted our store of batteries, and there were no coeds left to molest. My droogs and I made our way to the Durango. John made a quick detour to kick the teeth out of an old biddy’s mouth, and her dentures flew long and straight. Someone stopped him and asked him if he’d ever place kicked in high school. Soon, however, we were on our way to the South Plains. A lovely time had been had by me and the droogs. It is of no small misfortune that we never made it into the stadium. Did I mention there was an American football contest going on at the local university? Texas Technological defeated Texas Agricultural & Mechanical by a score of 43 to 25. There was a blocked kick or some such thing. They could use me droog Johnny boy.

Mike Leach wonders...

2008-10-20T06:26:00.001-05:00

...why people keep asking about him about playing a football game until the final whistle.

Caption Time

2008-10-16T21:06:00.001-05:00

5th and inches - Week 8

2008-10-16T15:35:00.002-05:00

OK boys and girls, an 8-8 mark last week against the number, so I didn't lose anything but some juice here and there, 11-5 on straight up winners/losers...yearly totals now are 51-33-1 and 76-23.

Let's roll.
=============================

**Thursday**

#9 BYU (2) @ TCU (Versus) - Interesting game here, as BYU has kind of had TCU's number of late, winning 5 of 6 in the series over the last 10 years. Last year's game at BYU was a close one, and I suspect this one will be as well. TCU...23-20.

**Saturday**

#7 Texas Tech (21) @ Texas A&M (FSN HD) - We'd be remiss, of course, if we didn't revisit the last time these 2 played at Kyle Field...

...with that said, Jerrod Johnson could be a real difference maker in this one, depending on if he gets to play and how they use him. He had a big day last week vs. KState, but got behind early and had to try and rally all day. If Tech can get the pressure going with an early score, it's a game they should win comfortably. I still don't know about 3 TDs, though. Tech...41-27.

#11 Mizzou (ABC HD) @ #1 Texas (7) - Coming off the big emotional win over OU, it'd be easy for Texas to be flat, and for Mizzou to be refocused after losing to OK State. I suspect Texas won't be flat, however, and it should be a tight ballgame. A late score makes the difference here. Texas...37-27.

Baylor @ #8 OK State (17) - After the big win in Columbia, it would be easy to expect a letdown from the Cowboys this week. I don't see it, though. Robert Griffin is a good one for the Bears and will be for a long time to come, but there's still a long way to go. OSU...45-21.

#16 Kansas (ABC) @ #4 Oklahoma (17') - Kansas was much better last week than they'd been at Iowa State. OU was good, just got beat. Oklahoma...38-17.

Kansas State (FSN) @ Colorado (3) - Big road win for the 'Cats last week...'Buffs still looking for their first Big 12 win of the year. Colorado...27-21.

Nebraska (5') @ Iowa State (Versus) - I told you last week Nebraska was a better team than folks gave them credit for. ISU, coming home after the Baylor trouncing, I look for them to get dominated up front. Nebraska...31-17.

#18 North Carolina (5') @ Virginia (ABC/ESPN2) - Suddenly, Virginia has found some life with wins over Maryland and East Carolina. Carolina has been winning as well, but now lost their best playmaker to a knee injury. Add to it that they haven't won at Virginia since 1981, and this will be a trendy upset pick this week. Virginia...19-17.

Houston (13') @ SMU - The Ponies found something last week in pushing Tulsa. I think they'll just find themselves behind this week. Houston...40-27.

Army (TW-Buffalo) @ Buffalo (10') - I'm squarely on the Army bandwagon now. I think if you live in Buffalo, you can get this on Time Warner Cable. Also, I think you should move. Buffalo...24-20.

Miami (5') @ Duke (ESPN U HD) - Miami...versus Duke...only a 5-point favorite...and not the Miami from Ohio? Never thought I'd see it. Miami...27-13.

Michigan (ESPN HD) @ #3 Penn State (24) - There's nothing here that doesn't say "Take Penn State." PSU...38-13.

#22 Vandy (Raycom) @ #10 Georgia (15) - I think the Vanderbilt Reality Tour continues for a 2nd straight week. Georgia...35-14.

#12 Ohio State (3) @ #20 Michigan State (ABC/ESPN2) - Wow. This is a tough one. Michigan St. hasn't won in this series since '99. Ohio State is better with Pryor at QB. I might feel different if this were a night game. Ohio State...20-10.

#13 LSU (3') @ South Carolina (ESPN HD) - Something's bugging me about this game, and I think it could eventually turn weird. LSU...21-20.

5th and inches - Week 7

2008-10-09T15:11:00.003-05:00

I own this blog, apparently. Sorry for no update last week. Had real stuff to do for a change.

Dammit.

43-25-1 now ATS...65-18 SU. Here we go.

==================================================================

**Thursday**

Clemson (ESPN HD) @ #21 Wake Forest (3) - The Oregon State on Thursday night show is finally over after 2 weeks and we're back in the ACC. Clemson is definitely one of the bigger disappointments of the year thus far, despite the fact that they wear purple pants. Wake, meanwhile, followed up a big win at Florida State with an egg against Navy, ruining a perfect season. Clemson's won the last 4 in this series, but I've got a couple of trends that go 23-7 in Wake's favor tonight. And since that's really all I know about it, I'm going with it. Wake...30-24.

**Saturday**

Nebraska (FSN HD) @ #7 Texas Tech (21) - Ya know, I've been to Tech/Nebraska games in Lubbock where there was a 21-point line. Only it was the other way around. My how times have changed. The Huskerdoodles are fresh off a pounding at home by Mizzou, Tech fresh off a road pasting of KState. The last time the Kids in the Corn visited Lubbock, they left with the worst loss in school history at 70-10. But I've seen Nebraska come south and play well, and I expect Tech to win here, but I suspect it won't cover the number. Tech...38-20.

#5 Texas (ABC) @ #1 Oklahoma (7) - Easily the game of the day...I even think College Gameday will be at the Fair for the 11A kickoff....which is a terrible time slot, by the way. With an 11A kick, the pregame on Austin radio starts at 11:30 Friday night. The newly revamped Cotton Bowl will be rockin' and it should be a helluva game. As for the game itself...OU has blitzkrieged each opponent thus far with their no-huddle offense. Texas has started pretty well, too, but for each, it will be the best opponent to date. With Colt McCoy being the leading rusher for Texas, I don't think that bodes well in this one. OU...31-21.

#17 OK State (ESPN2 HD) @ #3 Mizzou (13') - The Cowboys go north to Columbia, where teams have really struggled in recent years. I think this one's alot closer than the Vegas boys wanna tout it. OSU can move the ball, probably better than anyone Mizzou has seen yet. There's still questions about Mizzou's defense, though I think they'll be fine. Still, should be entertaining and close in the 4th....but I like the Tigers at home...Mizzou...34-26.

Kansas State (3') @ Texas A&M - Could be a real arrival moment for one coach, well...forget that. Sherman's going to take his lumps this year at A&M, there's no doubt. Ron Prince, meanwhile, should KState lose this one, I think he's a definite candidate for "For Sale" signs in his OFFICE come Monday morning. Somehow...I'll take the Aggies...A&M...27-26.

Colorado (ESPN2 HD) @ #14 Kansas (14) - A week from scraping by Iowa State, Colorado comes in licking its wounds...assuming buffalo do that sorta thing...after Texas came calling. KU has kinda followed the road many thought they might, coming back down to earth a little after last year's BCS run. But I think they're still better than Colorado...but I don't know about 14. Kansas....28-23.

Iowa State (FCS Central) @ Baylor (4) - The Bears are playing well in spurts, as are the Cyclones. That kinda thing usually goes over better at home. Baylor...31-24.

Notre Dame (ABC/ESPN) @ #22 North Carolina (7) - One guy for Carolina blocked 3 punts last Saturday and should have had 4. That doesn't have anything to do with this weekend, but you just don't see that too often. Hard to really like either one here, because the 'Heels offense did nothing last week, and Notre Dame outlasted Stanford...again. I'll take Carolina to win, but not by much. UNC...19-16.

#4 LSU (CBS HD) @ #11 Florida (4) - Another great one in the SEC...there's even been trash talk this week from the LSU side. I'm smelling a wild finish in this one and it's really too close to call. Florida...23-21.

Tennessee (CBS HD) @ #10 Georgia (13) - Georgia healed up for a week after getting blasted by 'Bama...Tennessee feasted on Northern Illinois. If, by feasting, one's talking about getting fat on Jenny Craig. Tennesse outlasted Northern Illinois, in Knoxville, 13-9. That's not a good setup for going to Georgia. Georgia...28-10.

Eastern Michigan (ESPN Classic) @ Army (1') - Army appears to have found something, with a tough loss at A&M and a blowout win over heavily favored Tulane. Army...30-20.

Tulsa (25) @ SMU - There will be lots of the forward passing of the footballs in Dallas Saturday. Tulsa...52-24.

Central Florida (ESPNU HD) @ Miami (15) - 2 tough losses in a row for Miami. Miami...27-17.

Michigan State (3) @ Northwestern (ESPN2 HD) - Did y'all know Northwestern is 5-0? Northwestern...24-20.

#6 Penn State (5) @ Wisconsin (ESPN HD) - Not sure why, but I think Wisconsin comes back tough after the Ohio State loss. Penn State...24-21.

Arkansas @ Auburn (18) - I'm sure this is on the MizLou network or something like that, but I can't find it. Lines are hard to find on this game because Auburn fired its offensive coordinator this week, 6 games into his tenure there. Tough to cover almost 3 TDs when you do something like that. Auburn...27-13.

5th and inches - Week 5

2008-09-25T15:10:00.001-05:00

Greetings fellow football fan-type peoples. More of the Thursday night footballs for you with 2 games on tap tonight, one involving the #1 team in the land.

Another good weekend for the Smoot last weekend, 9-4 ATS and 14-2 on straight-up winners/losers. For the year now, 35-18 ATS and 56-11 straight up. In phony money dollars at $25 per...the Smoot's up $425. But it's the footballs of the colleges, so you can expect a stock-market-esque crash any Saturday now. Let's get this crashing started.

**Thursday**

SMU (CBS College) @ Tulane (17) - 2 games lead off the weekend, the first of which would lead into the ESPN high school game of the week in most weeks. Ya gotta love a QB name Bo Levi, especially if you're an opposing defense. The Ponies followed up their 43-7 beating in Lubbock to the laid-back Mike Leach-led Red Raiders by getting summarily trounced by the incredibly high-strung Gary Patterson-led purple Frogs. Now they get the Green Wave, whose head coach is I'm sure extremely high-strung while being laid-back, which probably equals more butt beatings for the Ponies. Tulane...41-21.

#1 USC (23') @ Oregon State (ESPN HD) - About this game's most attractive feature is that it's in HD and on the West Coast, which means it might run a little later than norma, which is good for us night owls of the world. Normally, USC finds a way to sleepwalk through at least one conference game, especially if it's on the road. However, I don't see it being this one. USC...41-14.

**Saturday**

Arkansas (ABC) @ #7 Texas (28) - There is no way anyone should ever take a 4-touchdown line in this rivalry rekindling. Except maybe in this one. The Hogs have been really bad and Texas has looked really good, albeit against not-exactly-SEC athletes. Still...Texas...44-14.

#24 TCU (FSN HD) @ #2 Oklahoma (17') - TCU will undoubtedly be the best defense OU has faced thus far. This game is undoubtedly on the aforementioned high-strung Gary Patterson's "Make it personal" list for his team. But the last time they were in Norman, TCU won 17-10. I'd imagine it's been on the "personal" list for Bob Stoops for some time. I don't like the line being so big...and I think it will be a very-competitive football game...but I think in the end OU slips away for the cover. OU...38-17.

Army (Versus) @ Texas A&M (28') - A morning kickoff at Kyle Field. Actual Army came within a grenade's throw of beating Old Army in the Alamodome a couple of years in a true head-scratching "WTF Fran?" moment. Probably won't be the case this time. A&M...41-10.

Troy @ Ok. State (16') - Seems like it was a Friday night game or something (I'm not going to look it up) that found the Cowboys on the road in Troy Land last year. It was the end of the Bobby Reid era, if I'm not mistaken, as the Pokes were pounded by Troy. At slightly more than 2 TDs...I like this year's Cowboys over last year's...especially at home. Ok State...41-17.

Virginia Tech (ABC HD) @ Nebraska (6') - I've noticed I've got alot of 41s in here this week. That's not on purpose, and won't happen here. These 2 might not combine for 41. I see a real tough game here and I don't like 6+ either direction. Nebraska...20-16.

Colorado (ABC/ESPN) @ Florida State (6) - Don't ask me why, because then I'll spend 10 minutes telling you why, but I think Colorado goes on the road here and wins. Colorado...23-19.

La. Lafayette @ Kansas State (20) - Kansas Staters are a funny bunch, with lots calling for a short lease on the tenure of Ron Prince after getting lit up on national TV at Louisville. Lafayette, meanwhile, lost a 3-point ball game @ Illinois, who was no doubt looking toward Penn State this week. K State...30-14.

North Carolina @ Miami (7) - I can't find a TV listing, but I'm sure this is on Raycom 7 or something like that somewhere. Carolina disappointed in the Va. Tech loss, Miami won handily at Kyle Field. Miami...24-20.

#8 Alabama (ESPN HD) @ #3 Georgia (6) - No way do I like almost a TD in a top-10 SEC game. Both are playing well, but I think defenses rule the day. Georgia...17-13.

#9 Wisconsin (7) @ Michigan (ABC/ESPN) - Somewhere, something is telling me that this is going to be one of those "arrival" games for a coach/program. Obviously, Michigan doesn't need to arrive, but Rich Rodriguez does. I'm not ready to give him the win...but I think it could happen. Wisconsin...18-17.

Purdue (NBC HD) @ Notre Dame (2') - Ya know, this is one of those games where the Domers will win on a field goal that hits a rushing lineman in the helmet and then goes off an upright and through the posts. Notre Dame...21-20.

#22 Illinois (ABC HD) @ #12 Penn State (14) - 2 TDs is a little much for this one, methinks. Penn State...31-27.

Tennessee (CBS HD) @ #15 Auburn (6) - Another 6-point SEC line. Give me a break, Vegas line-making people. Auburn...24-14.

Maryland (Raycom HD) @ #20 Clemson (11') - Both are 3-1, Maryland has won 2 of the last 3 in Death Valley and beat #23 Cal two weeks ago. Still, I like Clemson. Clemson...38-24.

let's conversate

2008-09-20T09:54:00.000-05:00

5th and inches - Week 4

2008-09-18T15:45:00.001-05:00

Greetings all. A little Fall-like temps in the air have us primed for college foobaw this weekend.

11-3 against the line last weekend, so there's all kinds of phony money to play with this weekend. Not that I'm picking Rice to upset Texas or anything. Or SMU over TCU. Or Army or Akron. Wait, I think I picked that one...

For the year now, 26-14 against the line, 46-9 on straight up winners/losers. Here we go.

**Thursday**

#21 West Virginia (3) @ Colorado (ESPN HD) - Nightime in Boulder is a scary place to play the footballs, and with Pat White being counted on to throw the ball more for the Mounties, I don't like them here. Colorado...26-21.

**Friday**

Baylor (ESPN2 HD) @ U Connecticut (14) - Game 3 of this week's Big 12/Big East Challenge or something like that (Game 1 was Wednesday night) as the Bears hit the road for the first time this year. They're doing so fresh off a convincing win over a BCS opponent in Washington State, which is maybe like bragging about a photo shoot with Jenna Jameson and then being asked "Yeah, but have you seen her LATELY??" Hard to like the Bears on a long, long trip North. UConn...31-18.

**Saturday**

UMass @ #11 Texas Tech - No line here for another colossal showdown with Top 15 programs from two different divisions. UMass has had trouble stopping the likes of Holy Cross and James Madison. Michael Crabtree doesn't have his own university yet, but he should see plenty of green space on Saturday. Tech...51-14.

Rice (FSN HD) @ #7 Texas (30') - No reason not to take the 'Horns here, even if they whine about their pass defense. Texas...46-13.

Miami (3) @ Texas A&M (ABC HD) - Maybe the real moment when we all knew that Fran was canned was the Thursday night debacle in Miami last year when A&M went nowhere all night and Miami suddenly looked like Miami of old. They've since come down a little bit while A&M has looked about the same. Jerod Johnson could actually be a difference maker if he can get on the field...which might mean he has to sack Stephen McGee when no one is looking. Miami...19-14.

Buffalo (FSN PPV) @ #5 Mizzou (33') - I mean seriously...can Buffalo score 17 points? If so, and they lose 50-17...it's a cover by a hook. I was lovin' me some hooks last weekend. Mizzou...49-17.

Iowa St. (The Mountain) @ UNLV (3) - What the hell is The Mountain? Is that like "Go Watch it on the Mountain"? And if that's a network and that becomes their slogan, I demand some royalties. These 2 played in Ames last year and UNLV appeared to have scored on the game's final play, but it was ruled no catch and then apparently there was no review. Their head coach chased the officials into the locker room, then ran back out (and fell down) and refused to take his team off the field for quite some time. Now they get the rematch in the desert, a week after a huge road win in the other desert - or is technically the same desert - at Arizona State. UNLV...27-18.

Sam Houston (FCS Central) @ #19 Kansas - A week after blowing a 20-3 road lead by surrendering a 31-point outburst, only to tie it and then watch it slip away on the foot of a true Frosh kicker after a terrible INT decision by their all-everything quarterback...Mark Mangino is still very large. Kansas...61-7.

Akron (7) @ ARMY (ESPN Classic) - I figure if I pick ARMY enough times straight, eventually they'll cover. ARMY...24-21.

Notre Dame (ABC/ESPN) @ Michigan State (8') - From one Michigan to another, the Domers head to East Lansing. The last time they were there they snatched victory from the jaws of defeat to the point where the State radio guy had such an on-air meltdown the following week I don't think he's there anymore. Michigan State...31-24.

TCU (24) @ SMU (CBS College) - June Jones rudely introduced to the Metromess rivalry. TCU...41-14.

Va. Tech (ABC/ESPN) @ North Carolina (1') - Va. Tech is starting to rival Oregon for the worst unis in college football. Big opportunity here for UNC to get back onto a "stage" of some sort, after failing to capitalize on the Miami win of a few years ago. UNC...19-17.

#3 Georgia (6') @ Arizona State (ABC HD) - Georgia keeps winning and then getting jumped in the rankings. That's gotta piss off someone. Georgia...34-24.

#4 Florida (7') @ Tennessee (CBS HD) - It's never easy to go more than a TD on the road in the SEC. Signed, Auburn fans celebrating their 3-2 win over Mississippi State last weekend. Florida...20-14.

#6 LSU (2) @ #10 Auburn (ESPN HD) - We've got your safety right here. Signed, LSU fans. LSU...16-6.

#18 Wake Forest (ESPN2 HD) @ #24 Florida State (4') - Wake is ranked higher going into Tallahassee, and has beaten the 'Noles 2 straight, including 30-0 last time at Doak Campbell. Pretty sure I never thought I'd say that in the history of ever. Pretty sure I never thought it'd be 3 straight, either. Wake...27-24.

Farking season is finally here!

2008-09-15T16:32:00.007-05:00

After seeing the pics of the Jones flooded, you had to know the farks wouldn't be far behind. TTURaider, from the raiderpower forums, fired the first volley and boy was it a beauty!

Not to be outdone, the super creative and ruggedly handsome mdkimbro added his own touch...the Manginokrakken.

Some of you may not be aware of this, but in the world of farkdom there is a popular phenomenon referred to as the "Tennis Match." Basically, people add more and more images to an original work until it is either flat out stupid or your head explodes at the sight of all the LOLs....or in this example from the shaggybevo forums, both.

This thing has just about every Big 12 cliche you can imagine. From Gap Kid, to Listeater all the way back to the Corps guy pulling his sword on the SMU cheerleaders. Classic! The best actually had the bellringer in the middle, but apparently I can't post .gifs on blogger.
So, here's to another fun fark season getting kicked off right! We look forward to sharing many more with you this year.

holy lakes of rubber pellets, batman

2008-09-12T10:54:00.002-05:00

Lake Jones - waterfront suites are available.

5th and inches - Week 3

2008-09-12T08:28:00.002-05:00

So here we are for Week 3 of the college football season. I missed posting last night's Carolina/Rutgers tilt due to a faith healing session that ran long up here in Big Rapids, Michigan. The chicken fried steak at the Interstate Inn is not to be trifled with...and I'm not really sure that was gravy on top of it. Get thee back to Texas for your chicken fried steakness, praise God almighty blessed Jesus Lord, Amen.

A 7-5 week last against the line, 16-4 straight up winners/losers. For the year...15-11 and 33-7 now in those two categories. Special thanks this week to Ryan Hyatt for recognizing that the disco ball is once again spinning around here. I'll show myself out.

**Friday**

#13 Kansas (ESPN2 HD) @ #19 South Florida (3') - Great Friday night matchup...though it's likely to be over by the time I get back from some local HS Football. South Florida won an OT thriller over Central Florida last weekend. Kansas has squashed their 2 opponents, La. Tech most recently in the rain. Kansas won this matchup by 6 two years ago. Both are better now...home game for the Bulls...but I still like Kansas. KU...23-21.

Washington State (2') @ Baylor (FSN HD) - **Note, this game has been moved from Saturday to Friday night.** Hmmm...interesting game here. The Bears could get a feather in Art Briles' cap...assuming he spends alot of time in caps with feathers in them...with a win over a visiting Pac 10 team. They laid an egg against a good Wake Forest team, then bounced back with a win over Northwestern State last weekend. They say you improve the most in football from Week 1 to 2...which was actually last week but gives me a chance to use another cliche in here. Baylor in the upset...23-20.

**Saturday**

SMU (FSN HD) @ #12 Texas Tech (36') - So my father's an SMU guy from long ago, my sister went there and somesuch, so there's some familial rivalry in it. So he says to me, "How is it that Tech is favored by 36' over SMU. They won't win by 36." To which I said "Won't win by 36 touchdowns? Yeah, that is alot." Texas Tech...52-20.

Arkansas (ABC) @ #8 Texas (23') - This one has been moved to 9/27. Take Ike and lay the points the weekend.

Nevada (FSN PPV) @ #6 Mizzou (26') - Nevada played pretty well last with Tech, at least between the 20s. But they couldn't score enough...as I had predicted. Mizzou right now is firing on all cylinders, to get all cliche-like on you. Nevada will probably move it some...but Mizzou will move it more. Mizzou...44-17.

#3 Oklahoma (20) @ Washington (ESPN HD) - The Sooners leave the, uh, the Oklahoma is OK state for the first time in 2008. Last year's first trip out of, well, Norman, was a win at Tulsa, though not the prettiest. It will be interesting to see how Washington rebounds from a bonehead penalty last week that resulted in a 35-yard extra point try...that was blocked for all of you who say the penalty cost them the game. The kick was blocked, whether from the 10 or the 25. OU...27-17.

Iowa State (Big 10 HD) @ Iowa (12') - Always a tough one to pick in the big, emotional rivalries. Iowa has shown signs of life in their 2 ballgames, and ISU is off to a 2-0 start as well. Double-digits is a tough sell here. Iowa...24-20.

New Mexico State (FSN PPV) @ Nebraska (25) - Went with the Huskers and the big number last week...thinking about doing it again here as this is NM State's first game of the year after a hurricane rainout. Nebraska...45-17.

Mizzou State @ Oklahoma State (FCS Central) - OK State....51-13.

#5 Ohio State (ABC HD) @ #1 USC (10') - Sweater Vests on Ice heads West for a classic showdown of smashmouth vs. glitz and glam. Smashmouth has fallen hard on its last couple of big stages against speedy teams. USC...34-17.

Michigan (1) @ Notre Dame (NBC HD) - The Domers struggled with San Diego State last weekend...the Wolverines with Miami (OH). Notre Dame will suit up 11 leprechauns or something crazy and pull the win here. ND...19-16.

#10 Wisconsin (1) @ #21 Fresno State (ESPN2 HD) - Easily a top-5 matchup for the weekend...even though we're really talking about 21 vs. 10. Could be a trap for the Badgers, who split with Fresno in Wisconsin in 01 and 02. Fresno St....22-20.

#2 Georgia (8) @ South Carolina (CBS HD) - 2nd-ranked Bulldogs hit the road to face South Carolina, fresh off their loss at Vandy. Dawgs trying to keep pace in the polls, after falling from #1 despite winning twice. Georgia....23-10.

Other games of interest...

UCLA (Versus) @ #18 BYU (9) - Can Neuheisel keep the early magic going? BYU...31-21.

#16 Oregon (7) @ Purdue (ABC/ESPN2) - Ducks have proven that Big 10 stadiums don't scare them. Oregon...28-22.

#9 Auburn (10') @ Mississippi State (ESPN2 HD) - Laying 10+ in an SEC game is like hitting on 20 in Reno. Niblets...aka Auburn...24-15.

Reno Failure

2008-09-09T03:51:00.005-05:00

Well, it wasn’t failure, but it got pretty close to it. I just got back from spending a month in Reno, over the course of three days. Felt like a month, anyway. What a strange trip. I’m glad I made it, I guess. Just a few random thoughts:

The Game: In a word, it sucked. It really sucked. I know: Tech won, so it’s all good. But Jesus that was ugly. It had to be one of the worst officiated, worst coached and worst played games I’ve witnessed. Seeing as how I used to coach Pee Wee league, that’s saying something. It seemed like both teams were locked in a mortal contest of “fart and fall down” with the team least consistent in this endeavor the most likely to succeed. This game had it all. Fumbled snaps, dropped balls, over thrown passes, blocked punts, unsuccessful 4th down tries from the 29th yard line (on Tech’s side of the field), phantom holding calls. You name it; if it was bad, this game had it. Yeech!

Harrell looked terrible (see what I did there?). So many of his passes were off the mark and so many looked as if they were just lofted up in the air for anybody to grab, it led the Nevada fans around me to begin yelling “He’s just not that good!” I wanted to argue, but truth is, I couldn’t. It didn’t help that what Nevada’s corners were doing to Tech’s receivers would amount to a Class A misdemeanor for assault in many jurisdictions; the timing of the routes was clearly affected. Still, it stunk on ice.

There were some nice moments, though. You could tell that Morris was going to break that punt return early on, and it was fun to watch. On one of the few long connections Harrell made to Crabtree, the pass was underthrown. Crabtree had to come back for it, giving the cover guy a chance to grab him. What Crabtree did to him before breaking away was almost violative of the Geneva Convention. There were some nice runs: all of a sudden, we’re a running team? The defense looked like the defenses of old: “Lyle style.” But, they stiffened several times in the red zone after giving up a lot of yards.

A word about the officiating: When I was waiting to board the plane at DFW, I saw several guys with Big XII luggage entering the waiting area. One of the bags was being pulled by a middle aged, lanky guy, and it had “Jon Bible” embroidered on it. I thought “Oh Sh*t. I thought he only came to screw us when we played UT.” I will say, fellow Tech fans, that I gave thought to “taking one for the team” and trying to push him out of the hatch once we got to altitude. But he would have just parachuted to safety on the flag he always has at the ready anyway. At the game, his officiating was up to its usual level of ineptitude, although I must admit, his calls were just as bad for Nevada as they were for Tech. It surpassed the point of ridiculousness when he tried to flag Tech for roughing the kicker on a blocked punt. Even his fellow refs couldn’t take it anymore; they talked him into waiving off the flag.

Nevada’s team: By the way, their players have funny names. Lippencott. Kaepernick. Fragger. Sounds like something Jonathan Swift would write as a chapter title: “My Arrival in Lippincott Upon the Fragger.” Too bad about Lippincott’s knee. He’s a quality guy. Also, their band had a flag dude. You know…where teams have a band with a drill team and they have girls with flags. They had a dude out there with the girls waving the flags around. As Forrest Gump would say: “They even had a flag dude. That’s all I have to say about that.”

All in all, it was a win, and they covered the 12.5 spread I put $100 on at the casino before leaving for the game. So, it could have been much worse. It’s still early in the season, and there is time to work out the bugs. But if they play like this against UT or OU, it’s going to be ugly.

Their Fans: It’s interesting, being at a college game where they sell beer. I expected it to be pretty rowdy, but it wasn’t that bad. I sat on the north 45 yard line, in a nest of about 10 Tech fans completely surrounded by Nevada fans. No real problems. One guy in front of me was hammered and spent a lot of time wiggling his butt around when the stadium PA played AC/DC. He flipped off the entire stadium a good bit. But he was nice enough. A middle aged goof behind me leaned down and asked “Hey…you own an oil well? Heh, heh. Because all you Texans own oil wells, right? That’s what you’re famous for, ain’t it? Heh, heh.” I just turned around and said “No, I don’t. Do you own a whore house? Because, well, you know…” He didn’t talk to me any more. There was one retarded kid walking around before the game, totally plastered, wearing a foam rubber wolf head and screaming “AWOOOOOO!!!” in the faces of Tech fans as they walked toward the stands. But he was not drunk enough to be suicidal: he clearly circumvented a 6’3” big ol’ West Texas boy in order to get to me (all 5’8” of me) where he let out a particularly fine “AWOOOOO!” The students in the north end zone stands had a nice chant of “F*ck you, Texas!” going for much of the first half. It isn’t that they mistook us for UT, I think, so much as they liked the meter of the 4 syllable chant. But, it was pretty weak compared with an away game at Rice: Rice students can cuss you out in iambic pentameter. Nevertheless, after the game, several of the fans around us made a point of shaking our hands and saying “good game” or “congratulations” and thanking us for coming. You don’t get that often, anywhere. So, on the well recognized “Fayettville Scale,” rating home fan obnoxiousness, with a “1” being The University of Nebraska and a “10” being The University of Arkansas, Nevada would rate a respectable 4.5. It would be a “4’” were it not for “AWOOOOO Boy.”

Reno: A few thoughts about the town. They have gambling, which I love. I’ve never been to Lake Tahoe, so I took a drive up there. Wow! Now I can see why the Corleones moved there. I wish I was rich. They have a lot of those ground squirrel/chipmunk looking things-very cute. One of them borrowed $5 off me. The town of Reno itself is kind of scruffy. I think it had an above average incidence of mattresses laying on the roadside. Sadly, not all of them were unoccupied. Also, there were a lot of mini truck punks and guys in low riding Scions who looked like they would gladly hit you with a long-handled wrench. But, the town has “In-N-Out Burger” so it’s not all bad.

The Casino: I stayed at the Peppermill. Good buffet. The rooms in the new Tuscany Tower were very nice. Not too bad a casino, although the casino has an abundance of 70’s neon and metal ceiling tiles. Being a degenerate gambler, I go to Vegas a lot. So, I am familiar with your average “Vegas style” dealers, which generally fall into three categories: the indifferent Asian, the malcontent Slav and the On-The-Lam Canadian (a lot of dealers are foreign – something about having grown up in foreign elementary schools, where they are actually taught to count). The dealers at the Peppermill were truly friendly. It somehow feels better, having a nice person take all your money, don’t you think? My favorite dealer was “Big Sam.” Big Sam would look up at the TV’s on the walls that were showing Christina Aguilara videos and say “Daaaayum. Look at that BOO-TAY!” Big Sam took a liking to me, and determined to call me “Niblet.” (I don’t know why). Because the cocktail waitresses were pretty good with the free drinks, I got seriously sh*t faced Friday night. So drunk was I, in fact, that the “free drink scheme” worked on the Blackjack table and I actually hit a 20. You read that right. I hit a gawddamned 20. Big Sam tried to talk me out of it, but as Lincoln said: “I am not bound to win, but I am bound to be true.” Besides, Big Sam wouldn’t argue with me too much because my drunkenness also manifested itself in another activity: over tipping. I have to set this up right: my hit on 20 was all the more egregious because I was sitting on 3rd base and Big Sam had a 6 up. The other players were screaming at me, sure I was going to take the dealer’s bust card. Many of them were sitting on 17’s and 18’s. “Damn you all” I said, and I defiantly tapped the table for my hit. In truth, I was so drunk I had forgotten the “1 or 11” rule for an ace, so I thought I was hitting a 7-2-1 ten rather than a 7-2-11 twenty. My fellow players were, of course, ready to lynch me. Then, in proof of the old saying that “God looks out for children and idiots”, I drew an ace for a 21! Wait, it gets better. Big Sam then flips his down card and it was a 4. He had a 10! I had taken his ace for what would have been a 21! He draws a 6, then, draws an 8 to bust. My drunken ass had saved the day! Strangely, none of those ingrates bothered to thank me.

A Sea Of Red: I have to tell you, it was great staying at the Peppermill because there were so many Tech fans there. Saturday afternoon, the Sports Book was solid red. There were all kinds of Tech fans. Middle aged beer bellies, the twenty- something guys with the obligatory goatees, the little old West Texas ladies with the hair helmets. It just felt great being around all the Tech fans at an away game. Something about the “herd mentality” I suppose. I want to personally thank the tall, red-headed guy in the black Tech polo shirt. He had an 8 series run on the craps table that won me $250.00. The team stayed there as well, although I never saw them. I think I might have seen a few of them at the pool on Saturday morning. There was one guy I thought was Graham Harrell. I wasn’t sure, but when I saw him toss a wadded up napkin at a trash can and miss, I was pretty sure of it. Gerald Meyers was a regular on the corner Blackjack table. Gerald: always double down on 11. Always. Just don’t hit a 20.

American Airlines: I think I speak for everyone on flight 2012 when I say: You suck. AWOOOOOOO!!!

never enough

2008-09-07T21:11:00.000-05:00

5th and inches - Week 2

2008-09-04T13:21:00.002-05:00

Howdy boys and girls. Time for week 2's edition of 5th and inches, brought to you this week by Dos Equis. I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I prefer Dos Equis. I get nothing for saying that, by the way. An 8-6 week last week against the line, 17-3 on straight up winners and losers.

This week's schedule is kinda devoid of any real sexy matchups. In fact, I don't think there's one game with 2 teams in the Top 25 going against one another. Regardless...we press on...

**Thursday**

South Carolina (10) @ Vanderbilt (ESPN HD) - Always good to have South Carolina on TV because it gives us free reign to throw around the word cocks several times in an e-mail. The Gamecocks woke up in the 4th last week to dispatch with NC State 34-0, but switched QBs in the late going to do it. That QB starts this week......and his name is Smelley. He was also the starter last year in a loss to Vandy...the Smelley cock. South Carolina...22-16.

**Saturday**

#12 Texas Tech (10) @ Nevada - No TV for this one, which is being hyped a little bit as a potential shootout. Tech scores just about everywhere they go, and traditionally, so does everyone else. Both teams racked up big yardage totals and 49 points last week...but I don't think Nevada can keep pace in this one. Tech...41-20.

#11 Texas (26') @ UTEP (ESPN2 HD) - The last time UTEP hosted a Big 12 school in a late-night start at the Sun Bowl, Tech eeked out an OT win. But Johnny Lee Higgins and Jordan Palmer are long-gone off the Miners roster, and there aren't any Tech linebackers trying to cover receivers in this one. UTEP lost 45-17 at Buffalo last week. FYI...they weren't playing the Bills. Texas...45-13.

Cincinnati (ABC) @ #4 Oklahoma (21) - I have the hardest time remembering if Cincinnati has 2 Ns and 1 T...or vice versa. 21 is a big number to lay here, but playing OU in Norman is never fun. I think this one will be pretty competitive, really, but give OU to edge to pull away in the 2nd half. OU...42-20.

SE Mizzou State (FSN PPV) @ #6 Mizzou - Mizzou...52-10.

La. Tech (FSN HD) @ #14 Kansas (20') - La. Tech upended Miss. State last weekend at home and hits the road for Kansas this weekend. Again, almost 3 TDs is alot to lay in this one...but I've convinced myself to do it. Kansas...38-16.

Texas A&M (Versus) @ New Mexico (2') - The Lobos...throttled 26-3 at home by TCU. The Aggies...beaten 18-14 by Ark. State at home. Together, it's been a tough week in their respective camps. Aggie coach Mike Sherman promises things will get better...which is good...because they can't get much worse. New Mexico...23-20.

Eastern Washington @ Colorado - EWU played well in Lubbock last week, CU got a big win in the Colorado State game. Too bad there's no line on this one. Colorado...40-17.

Kent State @ Iowa State (7') - Cyclones looking to jump out to 2-0 start. Iowa State...27-19.

Northwestern State @ Baylor - Bears looking for first win for Art Briles. Baylor...38-14.

Montana State (FCS Central) @ Kansas State - Montana State upset Colorado a couple of years ago. Kansas State...49-14.

Houston @ Oklahoma State (16') - Actually a pretty entertaining game this should be. Ideas why that came out like Yoda I do not have. Houston will bring athletes, Ok. State coming off a road win to open the year at Wash. State. I think this one's pretty tight. Ok. State...27-18.

San Jose State (FSN PPV) @ Nebraska (26) - San Jose got by UC-Davis last week.......13-10. Big stage this weekend for the Spartans. Nebraska...48-7.

Texas State @ SMU - Hmmm...hate to say it...but the Bobcats could jump up and win this one. But I'll still give the nod to June Jones and the Mustangs...SMU...34-24.

San Diego State (NBC HD) @ Notre Dame (22) - Because I have a new TV and HD, I might actually watch this long enough to see Touchdown Jesus in high-def. Yeah, it took us about 20 seconds to become HD college football snobs. Oh, and SD State lost last week to Cal-Poly. Ouch. Notre Dame...39-6.

New Hampshire (ESPN Classic) @ Army - Why is Army on ESPN Classic all the time now? Army....29-20.

Miami (ESPN HD) @ #5 Florida (21') - In years' past, this woulda been a sexy Non-con game, but now it sets up to be just another Florida blowout with Tim Tebow bulldogging over people. Florida...31-17.

Miami (OH) @ Michigan (14') - The RichRod era at MIchigan got off to a rocky start last week as the Wolverines dropped their 2nd straight season opener at "The Big House." Seriously, haven't we used "The Big House" enough? Laying 14+ this weekend...it's risky. Michigan...31-14.

Other interesting games:
Central Michigan @ #1 Georgia (23') - Or are they #2 Georgia? Rankings slight might just propel the Dawgs to big-time scoring this weekend. Georgia...45-14.

#8 West Virginia (8) @ East Carolina (ESPN HD) - ECU's Pirates looking for 2nd straight upset this weekend. Easier said than done. West Virginia...34-21

The Going Price of a Butt Whuppin'

2008-09-02T09:59:00.006-05:00

As I was listening to the Eastern Washington game this past weekend, I heard one of the radio commentators mention that Eastern Washington was going to receive $450,000.00 for playing the game against Tech. The commentator also mentioned what some of the other Big XII schools were paying their non-BCS rivals that weekend. Florida Atlantic was getting like $900,000.00 to get bitch-slapped by the Horns. It got me to thinking about the economics of it all. Sure, “Buy Games” are nothing new. But, candidly, I never really like to think about the money part of this institution we love so much. I prefer to live in collegiate football “La La Land” where the players are true “student athletes.” I want to believe Michael Crabtree got his Escalade from a summer job making sundaes at the Dairy Queen. Humor me. Still, this “Rent-a- Punk” arrangement has raised a couple of questions and has me intrigued.

The first question is why would Tech pay somebody to come and play them in the first place? Four hundred fifty thousand bucks is not like some coupons to Crickets; that’s a lot of scratch, at least to me it is. Of course, the answer is obvious: since there are no preseason games at the college level, BCS teams need somebody to practice up on, and, to boost the overall win record for the season. One might wonder why the non-BCS school would go for it. Again, the answer is obvious: in the words of the great legal scholar Frito Pendejo :”I like money.” Besides, the kids from the non-BCS school get to see a stadium that holds more people than their school’s entire attendance over a ten year period, with a Jumbotron and everything. Additionally, the non-BCS school gets a little bit of exposure, although I’m not sure how much you want to be exposed losing by 40. Besides, they never know when they might catch lightning in a bottle and pull an Appalachian State number on somebody.

But the bigger question to me is: what do you get for your money? I mean, this deal is supposed to be a guaranteed win for the BCS school; and not just a win, but a lopsided one. So what happens when the deal goes awry? Tech was supposed to win a lot easier than they did, and probably by more points. At some point, one had to wonder : “Don’t these guys understand the arrangement? They’re making us work too hard. Should we get some sort of discount?” Conversely, if there some sort of really bad ass kicking administered, like Oklahoma’s treatment of Chattanooga this weekend, is there a “whuppass multiplier” where OU has to pay a little extra for each point scored over a certain number? Of course, maybe some schools, like “you know who,” should get a refund.

"$500,000.00 for this?!?! I thought we had a deal!"

Of course, being a money grubbin’ lawyer, I’m always trying to figure out a way to parlay an idea into more cash. I think this concept might have some applications elsewhere for Tech, maybe where we could turn a profit. Who has the best hockey team in college? Minnesota? We have an intramural hockey program, right? I say slap some Tech sweaters on them and send them up to the Twin Cities for a little old Northern hospitality. What’s wrong with our kids getting body checked out of a spleen in exchange for a few hundred large? A reverse butt whip could also work. I hear Tech has a really good meat judging team. Supposedly, they can differentiate a Porterhouse from a T-Bone at 50 yards in .2 seconds. We’re all so proud of them. I’m thinking we agree to overlook some gristle or maybe a little tapeworm action in exchange for, say, a small honorarium of $100,000.00, to lose to Okie Lite. Well, why not? They have the money to spend. T. Boone Pickens, the Dan Halen of college sports, could then buy the exclusive rights to the name “T Bone,” drop the extra “o” and make himself seem much cooler.

But this has potential outside of college sports. What if I need to impress a client with a big win in court? If some baby lawyer fresh out of school needs some bucks to pay off those loans, what’s the harm in my slipping him a little cash to not try too hard? Most attorneys don’t let a little thing like The Rules of Professional Conduct (number 1.06 to be precise), stand between them and winning. My oldest son outweighs my youngest daughter by nearly 100 pounds. But, he’s pretty mild mannered. My youngest daughter is quite a pisser, and I suspect she could take him in a no-holds-barred throw down brawl. I might not want his ego bruised when the next fight comes around. I bet she’d ensure a dive for some Hannah Montana tickets.

I’m making the trip up to Reno this weekend. With gambling, all-you-can-eat buffets and legalized prostitution, it ought to be a fun trip for all. Bring the kids! However, a convincing win will make it much better. I hope UN-Reno gets the check in time.

5th and inches - Week 1

2008-08-29T09:02:00.006-05:00

College football season is back with a vengeance, with first- and second-night classics such as Wake/Baylor, Stanford/Oregon State, Miami/Charleston So. and the Friday night classic - ya know, because it's live on ESPN Classic - Temple at Army.

So what's all this mean? The team with the number by their name is favored, a (') equals 1/2 a point in the line and if you take any of this jibberish as a tout and lose your house, that one's on you. Being that we're all Techtards around here, the Big 12 schedule gets featured every week, which means that during Non-Con games it's freakishly long. After that, I'll hit some games of interest to friends and other family members based on where they went to school, teams that they like their uniforms and/or whatever band wagon they've jumped on this year.

Yes, this is going up on Friday, so Thursday night's bloodletting on the Brazos has already occurred....but in the sense of fairness I won't change my pick. Either that or I'm too lazy.

Feel free to comment and/or suggest games for next weeks ramble. Otherwise, have a nice weekend and be glad it's football season again.

**Thursday**

#23 Wake Forest (12) @ Baylor (FSN) - Game 1 of the Art Briles era at Baylor. He's gone from Stephenville to Lubbock to Houston and now to Waco. If he should struggle there, which recent history indicates it WILL be tough, well he's that much closer to Stephenville again, which is what I think he might wind up liking more anyway. He's got more athletes in place for his system than alot of first-year coaches, following the exit of Guy Morris, who couldn't really make Tech's offense go there, which is interesting considering he claimed to help create it. There will be alot of buzz in Waco for this one and I think they'll play hard and keep it closer than the number.....Wake 27-17.

South Dakota State @ Iowa State - The Cyclones get a nice Week 1 tune up here....ISU....35-10.

Charleston So. @ Miami (FL) - Did you see where Iowa State was playing South Dakota State? Miami....41-3.

**Friday**

SMU @ Rice (3') - June Jones goes to SMU to once again try and revive the Ponies. Rice went bowling 2 years ago before Todd Graham bolted for Tulsa, but struggled under first-year coach David Bailiff. What's really funny about this game is that right now, if you go to the Rice Football Web site, there's a pic of the scoreboard with SMU leading 1-0. Not sure how that happens in football outside of Canada. I'm not sure why, but I think June and the Ponies get a road win here...SMU 28-26.

Temple (7) @ Army (ESPN Classic) - I'd like to know who does the scheduling for Army, because they appear to be able to get Temple to come to them two-years running. The Knights dumped the Hooters last year by like 16...but you fans of trends will be intrigued by numbers setting up in Temple's favor 20-6. Temple...31-21.

**Saturday**

#7 Eastern Washington @ #12 Texas Tech - No "real" line on this one, because as attractive as a 7/12 matchup is on paper, that #7 is a FCS team...formerly known at I-AA. So while both teams feature "explosive" offenses, it's not quite as pretty as it looks. No, I don't see an Appalachian State/Michigan upset brewing here because, well, because Michigan can't score with a team that can score alot. Tech can...and will....Tech 51-14.

Florida Atlantic (FSN PPV) @ #11 Texas (24) - Florida Atlantic head coach Howard Schnellenberger is old school in that he wears a coat and tie on the sideline, calls out opponents as being soft before they've actually played and his last name is worth more than 85 points if you can pull if it off with a "Triple Word Score" in Scrabble. Seriously, he said they'd show that Texas was soft in the opener. Schnelly pulled Miami to prominence with an MNC in the early 80s, then bounced around Louisville and some other digs before taking FAU to the New Orleans Bowl last year. If you know someone getting the game, it'd be worth seeing just to see how big the sweat stains are on his jacket. Texas...38-6.

Arkansas State @ Texas A&M (20) - The Indians of Arkie State are tough, playing Texas to the wire in Austin last year. A&M's looking for big things from new coach Mike Sherman. I think A&M wins and probably looks pretty good in places, but I don't think they cover the number. A&M...31-17.

Oklahoma State (7) @ Washington State - The Cowboys are a hard team to figure out, looking good one week and then getting dogged on the road at places like Troy the next. They opened last year at Georgia in a highly touted ballgame that, in the end, wasn't. Here, they go to Pac-10 land to open the year. WASSU gets Eastern Wash's coach in his first year there, and I'm sure there's lots of hope and hype. But I'm taking the Big 12 here to win and cover on the road against a team playing their first game for the new guy. OK State...31-20.

Chattanooga @ #4 Oklahoma - No line here, and if I could find one of those pics of Sam Bradford throwing the football all cross-eyed, I'd include it. OU...A-Lot to 6.

Western Michigan (FSN PPV) @ Nebraska (14) - Interesting that the Huskers are only favored by 2 TDs here. WMU played Mizzou tough last year in Columbia, so a Big 12 venue probably won't be any big deal to them. Still, I'll take Nebraska in Bo Pelini's return. Nebraska...33-15.

North Texas @ Kansas State (24') - It'll be interesting to see how Todd Dodge's attack translates into its 2nd year in D1 football. KState didn't follow up Ron Prince's first year like they wanted...but I think he got an extension anyway. I think UNT can score some points here, but I think they'll give up alot too. KState...45-20.

Florida International @ #14 Kansas (36) - About the most interesting thing in this game is to see if Mark Mangino is any bigger than last year. And also to see if he wears one of those long-sleeve blue velvet jumpsuits again. As the kids say, those are ftw!!!!1!!1 Kansas...51-14.

#20 Illinois (ESPN) @ #6 Mizzou (8') - 8 and a hook is a huge number in this game, in my opinion. Illinois came back to make last year's game close, and they've got good speed and quickness, as does Mizzou. And I think this is still a neutral-site game played in St. Louis. I think Mizzou wins, but not by more than a TD. Mizzou...27-20.

#24 Alabama (ABC) @ #9 Clemson (5) - Seems like the Bowden cat at Clemson is always on the hot seat, which is weird to me, since they're usually pretty good AT LEAST...and the only national championship Clemson's won came in 1980, and they cheated to get that one. Still, they act like Knute Rockne actually crapped out the rock the players touch as they come into Death Valley. Still again, they match purple pants with orange jerseys, and it takes stones to do that. Clemson...24-17.

McNeese State @ North Carolina - Did you see where Iowa State is playing South Dakota State? UNC...48-10.

**Sunday**

Colorado State (FSN) @ Colorado (11) - Wow...double-digit line in this game is unheard of. Either CSU got real bad over the off-season, or CU got really good. There's usually too much emotion for this one to get one-sided. Colorado...30-24.

Other interesting games:
App. State @ LSU - These 2 played in Baton Rouge in '06, LSU won 24-0.
#18 Tennessee (7) @ UCLA (ESPN-Monday) - I think UCLA pulls upset in Rick Neuheisel's debut.
Hawaii (Raycom) @ #5 Florida (35) - A year from the Sugar Bowl and having lost their coach, Hawaii comes to the mainland to open the year...and will likely get kicked in their chocolate-covered macadamia nuts. Speaking of, if anyone is in Hawaii...can you bring me some back? kthxbye.

Bizzaro Tech...

2008-07-16T15:05:00.001-05:00

with much thanks to the esteemed Kez for the Bizzaro Tech moniker...I'd like to report that this writer might have lost his damn mind. Or maybe...just maybe...something good is going to happen this year.

Just FYI

2008-07-15T20:59:00.003-05:00

My old username, BondJBond was associated with this blog's e-mail address - so keep an eye out for me under my new pen name, Aphrodisiac Jackson.

HOLLER.

oh yeah - Nasri is feelin' the Red Raiders...

OK, time for some Arsenal talk...

2008-07-14T23:40:00.002-05:00

I know, I know...it's a Tech blog and blah blah blah...both Bond J. Bond and myself are both big Arsenal fans...so I just have to pimp the new away kit (that's English for jersey). I dig it.

NO MORE BILLY PACKER.

2008-07-14T14:32:00.002-05:00

Thank God.

Packer out at CBS, to end Final Four run after 34 years

ESPN.com news services

Billy Packer's streak of Final Fours is over after 34 years. Packer, a color commentator, will be replaced in CBS' coverage by analyst Clark Kellogg.

Billy Packer will reportedly be replaced by CBS studio analyst Clark Kellogg.
"With his unquestioned popularity and performance over the years, Clark Kellogg earned all rights to this top spot," Sean McManus, president of CBS News and Sports, said in a statement Monday. "Like Billy Packer, Al McGuire or any of the most highly regarded broadcasters, Clark is an original voice with his own style and perspective." Packer, 68, will leave CBS after 27 years to pursue "other projects in basketball," according to The Miami Herald. Jim Nantz will continue in his Final Four play-by-play role. Kellogg, who has done game and studio analysis for CBS for 16 years, said he was "excited, humbled and quite pleased" at the opportunity. "I appreciate the confidence Sean has expressed in affording me this new role," Kellogg said in a statement. Speculation of Packer's exit was fueled amid widespread criticism during this year's tournament. Early in the semifinal between Kansas and North Carolina, with the Jayhawks up 38-12, Packer declared, "The game is over." North Carolina cut the lead to 54-50 with 11 minutes left before Kansas pulled away, winning 84-66. The Jayhawks beat Memphis 75-68 to claim the national title. Packer, who began his Final Four run at NBC, later defended the comment to USA Today. "My job is to say what I see, not have some kind of subconscious feelings about offending anybody. … It probably annoyed some people, but I don't concern myself with having some agenda that's contrary to what I'm seeing," he said. In 2006, he criticized the selection of four Missouri Valley Conference teams, before Bradley and Wichita State reached the round of 16. In 2004, Packer took umbrage at Saint Joseph's getting the No. 1 seed. In 2000, Packer bristled when asked to identify himself by two female students checking credentials before a game at Duke. One of the students, Jen Feinberg, quoted Packer as saying: "You need to get a life. Since when do we let women control who gets into a men's basketball game? Why don't you go find a women's game to let people into?" Packer later e-mailed an apology to the women. Four years earlier, he apologized on the air after he was criticized for referring to then-Georgetown guard Allen Iverson as a "tough little monkey."

HI EVERYBODY!

2008-07-14T13:51:00.002-05:00

Bob Knight's Eyebrows here. I guess I run this show now. Hope I can keep up with all this craziness.

Keep Your Eyes Ahead

2008-06-17T20:44:00.002-05:00

...is not just the name of the great Helio Sequence LP that I got for my birthday (Thanks Mom and Dad)...it's also quite fitting for this post...

About 2 years ago my daughter was diagnosed as having Autism.

I can't even describe how that felt. We knew it was true - but when a medical professional looks you in the eye tot tell you, that's a whole other matter.

We live in a smallish Texas town - one that relies on the ISD for the education of the community's special needs kids. They do the best they can - and in many cases they exceed expectations. But some kids fall through the cracks - and I wasn't about to let that happen to my child.

Over the last few months I have been hard at work to establish an Autism-only private school here in our community.

Tonight I can report to you that we will be open for classes this Fall.

I should be shot at sunrise if I were to imply that I had somehow done this all on my own. So many have helped out - either with their prayers, thoughts, services or time. Because we make every attempt to maintain privacy - I wish I could name them for you.

Tonight I also spoke with a DiscoTech! contributor, Bob Knight's Eyebrows who has graciously accepted the reins of this blog. I may still drop in a post now and then, but there's just no way I can attempt to keep up with the college football season like I did this past year and simultaneously open a brand new school. (Have I mentioned that I've never opened a school before?)

Thanks to all the readers who have complimented my posts. We do it for free - we do it because we love to Talk about Tech, Lubbock and the great State of Texas.

Bye for now...

Ouch

2008-06-12T07:45:00.002-05:00

Hey- if you've earned you're diploma, congratulations - you're "book smart."

Grouchy Obstinate Boosters

2008-05-14T10:27:00.002-05:00

Our site has for a long time linked up the two main message boards that provide online Raider nation with the bulk of our Raider nonsense - Rivals' RedRaiderSports.com (Inside the Double T) and Scout's Raiderpower.com (the home of Raider Alley).

In the past few days the Good Old Boys have been out in full force at Inside The Double T. Their season of discontent continues - and it's been an 8 year drought in West Texas as far as they're concerned.

My generation versus the GOB generation is turning out to be an ugly battle. The Good-Old-Boy generation seems to enjoy tearing down the new Texas Tech as they sip on their Natty Light and reminisce about the good old days of the I-formation and the Veer.

It's fair conversation to start, I think. No matter how successful a program may be, there will always be detractors, no matter how valid their claims may or may not be. Texas Tech has always had a bit of an uphill battle to be sure. The South Plains is home to a rugged breed - and that mentality is a great asset in times of difficulty. As it relates to Texas Tech football though, we've been on a pretty sweet little roll of success. I don't think that's a fact that is disputable at all.

So what's not to like?

We haven't won any Big 12 championships to be sure, but it's not like the trophy cabinet was full of SWC titles either. The one Cotton Bowl of that era was only achieved via a tie - and our trip to Dallas was awarded because the other eligible teams had "been there done that" more often than Tech.

Some of the complaints center on our recruiting - though it seems to me that Leach has clearly had a focus to bring in players that have skills that suit this program specifically - even when they may not have the "stars" that recruiting nuts have to have to validate their little lives. Not to mention the fact that Tech has done an OUTSTANDING job recruiting real-life student athletes. A recruit that committed recently had offers from 2 service academies. That's outstanding.

You know, as I recall, Spike Dykes recruited before the days of Rivals and Scout. I wonder how many stars Reagan Bounds would have had, or Tracy Saul. Did guys like that get offers from UT or Oklahoma? I bet they didn't. So how is Leach's recruiting somehow worse?

I have been quite proud that our football players of late have been smarter than average, graduating more than average and have character that is clearly above average. That has been a long time coming - a real shift in the fabric of Texas Tech Football - and may the sole reason I get so frustrated with the GOB crowd. Their implied complaint is that they would gladly sacrifice grades and character to have higher profile athletes to rub shoulders with I suppose.

Maybe instead of "lecturing" us (lecturer), you can kindly give us your recruiting credentials and experience.

As far as I can tell the GOB crowd really can't stand Coach Leach. I'm not just basing this on a few folks who were posting on an anonymous message board - but I believe these folks really do think Tech Football is mis-managed by Leach. Which is a thought that I just can't buy into.

Mike Leach represents all that is new generation about college football - and that just pisses off the old fellers...

Mike Leach is a lawyer, which doesn't help matters, but has a long list of demerits that the old money boosters just aren't ready to accept. Let's see if we can list all of them here and get those boys' blood pressure up a little higher - you know - to mess with their bypass a little...

1. Lawyer
2. Probably a Mormon
3. Never played football
4. Despite growing up in Wyoming - he's just not Texas enough
5. Glamorizes pirates
6. That VanGogh self portrait thing is just odd

We all know that the Spike Dykes days were full of back-slappin' one-liners that we all got a kick out of. They were also the same years that we fielded teams that were flagged by the NCAA as chock full of illegally recruited players.

They were the years where Coach Dykes would glad-hand the boosters and GOB crowd - regailing them with stories of coaching high school football in the backwaters of West Texas and in Midland. Always available for a round of golf or a hand of poker, Spike Dykes was the good-old-boy coach of your dreams. Somehow the old money crowd would gladly write big checks even while Bam Morris was getting thrown in the slammer and embarrassing our school.

I'm not here to beat up on Coach Dykes - rather to bring to light the differences I see in our program as it exists today. And to remind the GOB boosters about how things operate in the 21st century. We do things a little differently today.

And when we do win that Big12 title - will the GOBs slap my back and tell me what a great job we did?

a little over a day left

2008-05-09T20:52:00.002-05:00

to buy a piece of sparkly Texas Tech football history...

Ebay

I had a dream almost just like this

2008-05-09T19:26:00.001-05:00

I was wearing the Texas Tech basketball jersey and scoring.

Goodbye Mainland USA

2008-04-27T17:06:00.002-05:00

Bond J Bond will be off getting drunk and sunburned. Mahalo.

Some NFL Draft trivia....

2008-04-26T14:33:00.003-05:00

Name for me the last year the NFL Draft had three white guys selected 1-2-3 like we just had this year in Long, Long and Ryan? (Those three need to start a law firm, btw)

The answer is 1975 - 33 years...

Steve Bartkowski
Randy White
Ken Huff

The 4th pick that year was this guy Walter Payton - that name rings a bell for some reason.

bobby burton bows up

2008-04-24T19:06:00.002-05:00

Bobby Burton responded to the Daily Herald article that we just posted about yesterday.

Suprise! They deny blame and point the finger back at Ron Zook.

I win the nickel.

rivals and scout might be corrupt?? no!

2008-04-23T18:15:00.004-05:00

First of all - a HT to The Wiz for finding an interesting tidbit on the fallibility of recruiting "insider" websites...

First, the LINK from the Daily Herald in "Suburban Chicago"

Then the cut and paste job:

College coaches aren't allowed to meet or talk with potential recruits during this time, but it's a rule that has been fudged and/or flaunted in certain pockets across the country.

That's why head coaches have been banned from the road -- to prevent the rule from being fudged. Zook has at least two problems with this new plan.

"The reason that I was told is because they say when head coaches go out, they talk to the players," Zook said. "And I said, 'That ain't right.' But I will tell you this: If a high school coach is bringing a player in to talk to a head coach, he's bringing in a player to talk to an assistant coach, too.

"So it don't matter. They're talking to the coaches, right, wrong or indifferent."

The other issue grows bigger every day and needs to be addressed soon.

Because operator/writers for Internet sites, such as Rivals.com and Scout.com, are the only ones who have unregulated access to recruits when coaches can't talk to them, it's an area that's ripe for corruption.

Some programs have secretly allied themselves with the Web sites that report on their school as another way to communicate with recruits.

In return, the Web sites get better information, more traffic and make more money.

"We're turning the recruiting over to the so-called recruiting gurus," Zook said. "Now, all of a sudden, just like you've got basketball coaches complaining that it's turning over to the AAU coaches, now we're turning it over to these guys that can call them.

"Well, you know what a lot of them are saying. They're selling their school to these kids, and we're not able to talk to them. To me, we're losing this thing, in my opinion."

and now the insightful commentary:

Wow, it was only two days ago that the ranking of prospects on Rivals was a big topic of conversation on the Rivals boards...they just released their initial "stars" rankings and the inevitable onslaught of complaining began from know it all amateur talent scouts across the nation...

"Our guy should be ranked above your guy" - and Tech's favorite - the "Tech effect." That is, when a four-star athlete commits to Tech - despite offers from OU or LSU and the like - he automatically becomes a three-star athlete.

The author of the story, Lindsey Willhite (which is a guy, btw), makes a pretty stunning accusation - that there are Universities that have "secretly" aligned themselves with a particular recruiting company. Interesting - this isn't Watergate or anything - but I wonder what editor would allow that kind of allegation to be published without and supporting evidence.

Because Ron Zook says so?

Ron Zook is on record as saying "It don't matter" so I hope they aren't counting on Ronnie's towering intellect.

The next step would be to investigate the books of Rivals and Scout - their automatic answer would most certainly be a denial - and there would be scarcely any way to prove the allegation to be true.

We know that Rivals and Scout are certainly profit-focused - we enjoy the fruits of their labor every day - it's fun to be in "the know" about your football program - the access they are able to provide is impressive.

Despite the fact the allegation shouldn't have been published...I have no doubt that it's true. So DT! readers, do we care if Tech is paying money for more and better access?

guys love girls on horses too...

2008-04-18T20:59:00.006-05:00

Seth at Double T Nation gonna be a little upset - his man - the mustachioed Masked Rider has had his spurs retired...

So one last pic of Mr. Kevin Burns...
A sincere "Thank You!" from the fellas at DiscoTech! We also want to say thanks for you Gator Bowl run - we'll never forget it. We hope you find your future of many beautiful West Texas sunrises.

Marlena Hartz of the A-J announces our newest Masked Rider...Ashley Hartzog.

Hartzog, the 47th Masked Rider, is a senior animal science and Spanish major. She takes the reins from Kevin Burns.

She said she has been enchanted with the mascot ever since she first laid eyes on the horse and rider at a football game with her father, a Tech alumus. She was just 5 years old.

Waddya know...we have the inside track on Ms. Hartzog...

Farwell?

Hey, I had to look it up - so I'll save you the time:

View Larger Map

EA Sports NCAA Football 2009 Trailer

2008-04-16T20:59:00.003-05:00

As if there weren't already enough to get you pumped about the upcoming football season, here is the preview for EA Sports' NCAA Football 2009 courtesy of gametrailers.com.

http://www.gametrailers.com/player/32876.html

I personally have been a fan of the series itself since the 1995 Bill Walsh version. You even catch a glimpse of Michael Crabtree in the video.

guys love cheerleaders

2008-04-14T20:57:00.007-05:00

So the boys over at Raiderpower are asking for more Rhonda Lewis - who am I to be a buzzkill? And I'm even gonna toss in some new beauties tonight - just because I care...

Pamela Cameron didn't even WIN Playmate of the 1971 La Ventana! Who was judging that year? Did some guy have a frozen pizza box on his head?

Rhonda - Serious about TDs

The total package

The Cadillac of Cheerleading

In the top 8

2008-04-13T08:32:00.002-05:00

...dunkers of all time...

Thanks to TAnderson1988 on the Rivals board for this...

I don't know why the production company couldn't get the rights to the actual dunk that is his most famous...so here's the video for y'all:

For the golfer in your family

2008-04-12T08:42:00.004-05:00

In my case, that just happens to be ME.

Sooooo.......Happy Father's day to me...

MyJoys by FootJoy - with collegiate logos!

The great part is that this isn't one of those products that you can only get with a burnt-orange longhorn on it...you know, like those killer flip-flops you see at the grocery store...

Despite the fact some of our readers may not be in the mood to spend money on their house right now...just remember that when you need that new air conditioner - don't forget to look at the York Affinity models...

I have to say that the Double T is showing up on a lot more products these days - it's a good thing...

Congrats to Coach Hays

2008-04-06T16:50:00.002-05:00

...as he becomes only the fourth college baseball coach to make it to 1500 wins in a career...

ESPN

I think his career is more than likely pulling into the station - I am glad to say I got to see him manage many a game at the Law...

Congrats Coach Hays!

Not the NIT - the PIT

2008-04-05T19:26:00.005-05:00

DT! Now at guard for YOUR Tidewater Sealants.....

MAR....tin........ZEEEEEEEEEEnoooooooooooo

Portsmouth Invitational Tourney Rosters

Seriously, I loved Martin Zeno's time at Tech. When I say that, what I mean is...I am so glad he has graduated and I don't have to hear about how he hasn't improved any over the summer...

I expect that he won't be drafted and that his time with the Tidewater Sealants will be a prelude to his trip over the pond to Europe. The kid from Sulfur, Louisiana will have a hard time finding crawfish etoufee in Spain, I'm almost sure of that.

DT! A couple of things to note from the recent A-J...

If you're in Lubbock (I'm not) , please make it out to the McCool Track and Field Center and support the Burkhart Center's fundraiser...I don't advertise here - but I make an exception for it when it comes to raising money for a cause that help kids with Autism...

Tech autism walk to benefit Burkhart Center

Texas Tech's autism research center is hosting a walk to raise money for two projects.

The Burkhart Center for Autism Education and Research will host "Hands for Hope 2008: A Walk for Autism" at 2 p.m. April 13 at Coronado High School's Willie McCool Track and Field on 34th Street and Vicksburg Avenue.

This month is Autism Awareness Month.

Proceeds from the walk will be used to help construct a building to house the Burkhart Center and a residential village for adults with autism, according to a Tech news release.

Walkers can register online individually or in teams at www.burkhartcenter.org.

DT! And once again "You can't beat our meat..." judging team -

Tech meat animal team wins back-to-back titles

Texas Tech's meat animal evaluation team won its second consecutive national championship March 27-28 at the 2008 National Meat Animal Evaluation Contest held at the Oklahoma City Stockyards and Oklahoma State University, according to a university news release.

Also, the university's livestock, meat and wool judging teams recently won intercollegiate judging competitions at the Houston Livestock Show and Rodeo.

The three teams placed first in their respective divisions, defeating hundreds of contestants, according to a news release.

So, who's the MVP on this squad? Is there one singular player of note? A student that is struggling with the decision to stay on the team and stay in school - or head straight to the pros and get their career underway?

Anyone with some inside info that can help us understand our national dominance in this field would be appreciated.

The Reload With Reagan Campaign

2008-03-28T06:51:00.002-05:00

...is in full swing - getting national coverage on With Leather this week...

Reagan's YouTube video is piling up the views as people all over the country now wonder "why is he simulating masturbation on the steps of what looks like the public library?"

Check out Reagan's campaign headquarters...and you might want to turn your speakers because the Corps Band is in full effect at his site...

The College Baseball Hall of Fame

2008-03-24T19:00:00.004-05:00

What I'm listening to:and the pride of Aledo, Texas...

Folks, that's Dan Hunter - he's just released his full-length "Texas" LP...and it's incredible...go to iTunes and make the kid rich!

On to Tech stuff...but first a little bit of a story to set up DT!s first "e-mail intervew."

While I was a student at Tech I made many, many friends, but I'm pretty sure nobody was as legendary on campus as a guy I had the pleasure of getting to know fairly well, Chis Snead.

Chris was a student at Tech for a little longer than 8 years (maybe longer). Never before had I met a guy that was as in love with his school - and sports in general - as Chris. (If you get to meet him, ask him how many hats he's up to.)

He invited me to come sit with him at what would be my first Texas Tech Baseball game at Dan Law...and what an experience that was. For the uninitiated, Chris was the ringleader of a group of fans known as the "Tech Hecklers." They created an enviable environment and a distinct homefield advantage. They raised the level of heckling at the baseball diamond to an absolute art...it was something to see...if you want to lean more about the Hecklers and read more about their storied history - click the LINK and have a cup of your favorite beverage ready...

Dr. Mike Gustafson on the left and "Sneader" on the right

Chris, fittingly, went to work for Texas Tech after he finally did graduate - and he continues to be an ambassador for Texas Tech and Lubbock.

While we were at Tech together (something only about 100,000 Red Raiders can claim) we shared many beers and many trips to Ruidoso so it was fun to re-kindle an old friendship...

One day not too long ago I had the occasion to call Chris as we had some no kidding business to discuss - and while on the phone I asked him about the current project that has garnered national attention - the College Baseball Hall of Fame.

Before we get started, you might want to check out these links...

College Baseball Hall of Fame/College Baseball Foundation

Here goes nothin'...

DT!: So Chris, give our readers an idea about what you were drinking (and who you were drinking with) when you got the crazy idea to start the College Baseball Hall of Fame…

"Sneader": Actually, we were having lunch at a local barbecue joint, the we being Mike Gustafson, Brad Walker, Ryan Hyatt and another person. For several years, Mike Gustafson and Brad Walker had talked about creating an award for middle infielders in college baseball since there was already an award for player of the year, pitchers and catchers of the year. Well, we came to find that the Smith Award, a national player of the year award given in Houston, was no longer being given in favor of the new Roger Clemens Award for pitchers. So we decided to create our own Player of the Year Award. A few meetings later, an opportunity feel into our laps when we were informed that there were plans for a West Texas Sports HOF to be built in the proposed Minor League Stadium that was to be built in Wolfforth, just west of Lubbock. In subsequent meetings, there was an agreement between that group and the College Baseball Foundation, the umbrella organization for the HOF and Wallace Award, that would have placed the College Baseball Hall of Fame out at the site but the plans fell through with the construction. So we got from a simple little middle infielder award to a College Baseball Hall of Fame in a really short time.

DT!: How has the Hall of Fame and the College Baseball Foundation being received by the players?

"Sneader": The response has been overwhelming! We hear stuff like “Thank goodness you guys are doing this” and “it’s about time!” We are inducting our third class this summer and everyone of the inductees has been in town for the inductions or had a family member accept for them if they were deceased. I think that these guys appreciate what it is that we are doing which is telling the story of college baseball.

DT!: Some folks are just stunned that Lubbock would be the home of this facility. How do you deal with that controversy?

"Sneader": That is a natural reaction for a person to say “Lubbock?!?” But that is okay. What we do is open the doors of our fine city and show off the hospitality of the great people of west Texas and by the time that people leave, we have created a new convert. 2007 Inductee “Bobo” Brayton said in his induction speech “The world needs more Texans,” referring to the kind way he and his wife were treated in Lubbock during his stay.

We don’t feel we have to apologize for where we are. Lubbock is a great place for this. Why Cooperstown, NY? Why Springfield, Mass? Why Canton, Ohio? The truth of the matter is that Lubbock is the place that we live and it is a terrific baseball town, not to mention, it is where we all live!

DT!: What are the future plans for the actual site of the facility and what kind of support are you lobbying for?

"Sneader": The city of Lubbock is about to kick off a large downtown revitalization project and the CBHOF is a large part of the plan. We have the support of the city and will be able to make some fairly large announcements regarding partnerships with the city in a few months. Additionally, we have hired the same person that put together the feasibility study for the George W. Bush Presidential Library to do one for the College Baseball Foundation and we will be kicking off a large capital campaign following this summer’s events.

DT!: When did you decide…”Hey, I need to graduate already?”

"Sneader": When my parents told me they were going to quit paying for school when my younger sister graduated from Tech.

DT!: Has the tradition of the Tech Hecklers continued? Have you considered a Heckling Academy?

"Sneader": The Tech Hecklers has become more of a booster organization, continuing to raise money for the baseball and softball programs, however, on occasion, we put on a little rag session. But nothing the way that so many remember us back in the day. I actually have been approached a couple of times and will be going over to the University of New Mexico to put on a Heckling Clinic for the Lobos at the request of their new head coach, Ray Birmingham. I also do a session on Sportsmanship every year at the student organizational academy put on by the Center for Campus Life.

So that wraps up this evening's post - I hope you guys enjoyed it...

Keep an eye out for the College Baseball Hall of Fame and make sure when you're asked to support it that you give what you can.

Lastly, Sneader, from the folks at DiscoTech! we thank you for your time and your awesome support of our favorite school...If we can ever help you out in any way you be sure and give us a buzz...

Wreck 'em!

Guns Up Erin Andrews

2008-03-23T22:10:00.002-05:00

My favorite part is her left foot, playfully out of her heeled shoe...that and her incredible....guns.

Thanks to Barstool Sports

Danny Amendola - NFL Draft

2008-03-23T21:10:00.002-05:00

The comparisons to Wes Welker will be in every. single. report.

Wes Welker and Danny Amendola happen to be short, slowish, white guys who run good routes and work hard. Wait a minute. Isn't that how short, slowish, white guys make the field for their college teams as well?

Let's let Draftguys.tv tell us their side of the story...

Thanks to the fellas at draftguys for stopping by Raiderpower and letting us in on their work...

Aggie Editing at Its Finest

2008-03-18T20:41:00.002-05:00

Aggie Editors are no stranger to overlooking major details in their publications. Just look at the "Classless Clown" fiasco in their 2002 Football Media Guide. However, this latest mistake has got to take the cake. Who else but Aggies would have an advertisement lauding their work, only to place an individual wearing the logo of a rival school squarely in the most predominant frame? Heck, if it didn't say "Texas A&M," I would mistake it for a Texas Tech ad!

HT to ttuhog on RaiderPower.com for this find.

Texas Tech - a gift - from above

2008-03-18T19:22:00.002-05:00

Click on the pic to zoom in.

Another debt of thanks to Scotty at TV TanLine who sends his best to DT! readers with the above gift...

While I can't be exactly sure when the photo was taken, it appears that it was after the United Spirit Arena was built, but before the Garage Mahal.

I can almost exactly make out where I ran from the "rape van" after it caught me taking pictures in front of the Seal at University and Broadway. Why do I say that I was "caught?" Well.... I, along with three of my dorm mates, was wearing only a well placed gym sock in a bit of a Red Hot Chili Peppers tribute. Which is funny because they were doing a tribute of sorts of another famous band...

If you know the name of said album - or what I'm talking about of all - you're gaining a better idea of the years that I attended Tech...

Great pic - thanks again to Scotty...

DT! I had a great conversation with an old friend of mine today, Chris "Sneader" Snead. He may not have quite believed that I am Bond J Bond, so I wanted to give him a "shout out" so he knows I wasn't trying to pull his leg.

I think I also convinced him to give DT! readers what they want - an interview with him so he can fill us in on the progress with the College Baseball Hall of Fame.

Some new sites to link up

2008-03-13T19:28:00.003-05:00

Absolutely Obknoxious

I'm gonna go out on a limb and say that if anyone knows Bill Knox - he's writing a lot about Tech baseball - give him a read...

Saturday Soundoffs

I know absolutely nothing about this site - but they've linked up DT! so I'm returning the favor...

Helmet Head

This guy is amazing - he reconditions game-worn college football helmets and sells them...and he does a great job. I spent some of my Christmas money with this guy - and I was extremely happy with the work. From the main link HERE click NCAA Game-used/Reconditioned in the left-hand column - select the conference you prefer - and then your favorite team...

Also of note, he has NCAA Vintage helmets (there aren't any TTU helmets btw) and some of those are just amazing.

Maybe a game used Houston Gamblers helmet is more your style - check out his USFL helmets - seriously, I could spend more than a few paychecks at this guy's online store...

In case you've been keeping up with Zebbie's run through the Helmet Project posts - you may get the itch to actually own one of those helmets - and you CAN!

Okay, Okay, Okay....

2008-03-12T17:30:00.002-05:00

An e-mail from Scotty at TVTanLine makes about the 5th e-mail in as many days that I have received that range along the lines of:

"What the hell is going on over there?"
"Where are you?"
"We miss you!"
"I want to have your baby."

Well, at least 3 of those are true.

So here's the parts of the story I'm willing to share...

I have a daughter with Autism. In addition to that she has some other health concerns that make a routine day - well - less than routine. Of late, there have been some tough decisions to make around here and like I was telling Scotty, things that I do for free - and in my free time - have simply dropped off the radar screen.

Added to all of that is the fact that I'm just not as big a college basketball fan as I used to be, and by comparison where 10 is my interest in Tech Football - interest in Tech Basketball is probably a 4. Oh I'm sure that if we were fielding a competitive team in conference I may find time to blog about it a little - but our .500 record sure hasn't made me even the tiniest bit more motivated.

The blog is certainly not dead - I would continue to post pictures here of hawt Tech co-eds if anyone were to e-mail them to me - and I hope one day to be more proficient.

Hang in there - and be blessed by your healthy children - and pray for those kids who aren't so healthy - especially for their parents.

I appreciate all those who have e-mailed - some of you have caught me on bad days - and I'm sure you know who you are - and some have caught me on better days - I do appreciate that folks even care about our little corner of the web...

Rhonda Lewis back by popular demand

2008-02-20T20:48:00.005-06:00

Real life has really messed up the blog - maybe one day we'll have beers and I can tell you what's going on...just bear with me...everything's gonna be okay eventually...

I did notice that some folks had picked up on the pic of Rhonda Lewis...

I happen to be a guy who was born in the 70's, but I think I speak for all of us when I say:

Rhonda Lewis, based on my research, has to be in the top 5 of all-time babes to ever grace Texas Tech's campus...

Both of those images - if you click on them make a larger pic...

Wreck 'em.

T to the Izzo

2008-02-16T17:12:00.001-06:00

I am Wes Welker....

2008-02-05T15:58:00.000-06:00

This video is great.
Nevermind its a shameless plug for a Oklahoma Newspaper or the fact that the Little Girl said Wes made Mike Leach. Everytime I see that boy play it makes me wonder what I could do if I just let it all hang out and play every minute like it was my one and only shot.

I am Wes Welker.

Bye Bye General

2008-02-04T17:49:00.000-06:00

5:49 PM CST:

More to come later - Coach Knight tenders his resignation and Pat will coach the rest of the season.

A not-so-surprising event IMO...

Lubbock A-J

Thanks for all you've done for Tech, coach. The mark you have left here extends far beyond the hardwood.

7:00 PM CST:

ESPN News' Matt Winer breaks the story to the MSM crowd:

7:18 PM CST:

Not two hours before the resignation story hit the wires, Doug Tucker with the Kansas City Star published this great story about the cooperation between Coach Bob & Pat Knight who were in cooperation with The Dark Side and Coach Rick Barnes...

A fantastic read - here's a clip:

Red Raiders coach Bob Knight and his son, assistant coach and head coach-designate Pat Knight, went to the Longhorns last year for advice on improving their team's conditioning and strength.

After talking with their good friend, Texas coach Rick Barnes, they hired Chris Braden, the Longhorns' assistant strength and conditioning coach for men's and women's basketball. With Braden in charge of conditioning for the Red Raiders, facilities and players have all been upgraded.

"To be honest, we thought there was a guy at LSU, Auburn, that we needed to talk to," Pat Knight said Monday. "And Rick told my dad, 'If it was anybody else but you, I'd give you a different name.' But he actually told us, 'Hire our top assistant.'"

Wow - deals with the devil and then a resignation...coincidence? I think not.

Linky doo

7:58PM CST (for DT!) - the original Lubbock A-J article was updated at 7:18PM to add Coach Knight's comments:

“It was always a problem for me as to just what would be the most effective way in this transition, to make this transition. And with all the thought that I put into it, that’s exactly how I felt that it should be.”

Knight said he informed the team prior to practice Monday. The Red Raiders (12-8, 3-3) will play at Baylor on Wednesday.

Myers was in a similar situation more than three decades ago when he took over the Red Raiders’ program mid-season. He said he was surprised when Knight told him Monday he was stepping down, but he also understood Knight’s reasoning.

“I think I do understand why he decided to do it at this particular time,” said Myers, who took over as head coach in January, 1971, before coaching 20 more years at Tech. “He felt it was the right time for him to step down and I’ll miss him. He’s done an outstanding job for this basketball program of building it up. He brought more recognition to the program, to the university and to the city of Lubbock than anybody, in my opinion. It was great to have him on our staff and he was great to work with.”

Knight said this is not a health issue, though he said, “I feel better today than I did on Saturday.”

I'm just glad he indicates his health is not the reason for him stepping down - that's great news.

8:03 PM CST:

Bill Raftery and Jay Bilas were working the Louisville/Marquette game when the news broke - their reaction follows the announcement...

8:06 PM CST:

Pat Forde was just interviewed on ESPN News saying that Bob Knight is a hypocrite for stepping down mid-season. That he'll be writing an article to that effect. I hope so. I hope he does it so that we Red Raiders and Knight-backers can rip him for being an idiot.

If Pat Forde would just do himself the favor of reading Coach Knight's own comments on the situation I would THINK that he would see Knight has the best interests of the program in mind.

Nothing to be ashamed of

2008-02-04T07:18:00.000-06:00

A couple of notes from last night's Super Bowl...

Wes - had the Patriots won - would have been the MVP of the game. Any person who watches football knows that would have been the case. Wes was the only guy open on most of the plays the Pats ran - and he made the most of every ball thrown to him.

But he wasn't the MVP - Eli was. Lank Johnson told me last night he couldn't believe the other sister won that game - but he did.

I can't even imagine how much money casino operators raked in last night - I imagine a couple of them are near liver failure this morning.

In Tech news - National Signing Day is near - we hope to have a recruiting wrap-up posted this week - we welcome all of you guys to Tech with open arms. We hope you find the women to be hospitable and equally as talented as you...

The love for Wes grows

2008-01-28T06:36:00.000-06:00

I'm not a journalist - as you can tell - I barely write at all....sorry.

BUT...

The Wes Welker story is popular - and so often written about because it's the ultimate David against Goliath story.

The small man with the big talent and even bigger heart faces unsurmountable odds and yet comes out victorious. But only after he's pictured at age 4 with his pet bunny, Thumper. I guarantee a call from Wes to his mom today:

"Ma, why the hell did you give them that picture?"

"It's cute son, you loved that bunny."

"You understand I'm gonna have bunny stickers all over my locker tomorrow, right?"

"It won't be the worst thing that's ever happened to you, Wes."

And once again Ma will be right and Wes will beat back bunnies and win a Super Bowl ring. Wes Welker is unstoppable. Maybe he can even join Timmy Smith and come home with a Super Bowl MVP trophy.

Sparky look-alike Elizabeth Merrill of ESPN with the article HERE.

Only if you really love us...

2008-01-21T17:58:00.000-06:00

It has been our pleasure to bring to you a Texas Tech blogging experience. We hope that our readers like us so much that they would throw a good word in for us as the 2007 College Football Blogger Awards kick off.

Rocky Top Talk is the clearinghouse for all of these awards - and in case you didn't know - they're kind of a big deal.

Take a peek at the 2006 Awards - their nominees and the eventual winners.

I won't be nominating us. I feel like that would be a little crass. Although some of you are wondering right now "Well if that's the case why is he bringing these awards up at all?" Well Mr. Smarty, I'm bringing it up in the hopes that there's a Red Raider out there that wants us to win an award.

By the way...I think our very own Ignatius J. Reilly should at least get nominated for the "Jenn Sterger's Rack Award" (Best Photoshop or gag post of the year) for his following efforts:

UT Football: Recruiting Champions

Job Options for Coach Fran

Everybody Loves Fran

Texas Tech Wins the MNC

Our all too infrequent contributor "yar" wrote our best piece to date - and incredible read on the Texas Tech/Texas A&M rivalry that is Pulitzer quality. Please Baby Jesus would somebody send this in for the "Tyrone Prothro and His Amazing Catch Award."

Drinking With Boris Yeltsin (Texas A&M Preview post)

Cabron Guey created a great .gif for us:

I has a hat!

As for DiscoTech! I think our best shot to be recognized on this stage would be in the "Best New Blog" category.

Myself, I think I'm certainly going to throw a nomination in the hat for "Best Big 12 Blog." I'll be nominating Seth at Double T Nation. I'm continually amazed at the work that guy puts into his blog. Remarkable work from a guy that I also happen to like.

Thanks for your time.

We always appreciate you dropping by.

The Ultimate Tailgaters

2008-01-20T08:42:00.000-06:00

...are about to kick off their next sponsorship fiscal year. Please help these guys out.

First, click the link below and visit the site.

Second, get on the phone and send money!

If you haven't been to these events you need to make sure you go.

These guys are committed to making sure Texas Tech Football has the best gameday atmosphere in the nation.

The Ultimate Tailgaters

Congrats to Bobby Knight

2008-01-17T19:42:00.000-06:00

Steve "I wish I was a Lehman Brothers Wall Street type" Lavin:

Coach Knight's Post-Game Presser:

Really, this game ws pretty cool - I was away from the house for the first half - came home at halftime and turned on the TV...

I passed out for a few minutes after I saw the score, my wife revived me by throwing some bourbon on my face and I was as good as new.

I watched the lead drop as the second half began and did my best simulation of our play whilst on the loo...

Came back to the tube and both the Red Raiders and my digestive tract were once again in perfect harmony.

Then Coach Knight gave the crowd a jab - which they deserved - but which Coach Knight will take some abuse for. Hey - the truth hurts sometimes. Like when I go to the amusement park and try to ride the rides and they tell me I can't because my head still fits under Mickey's hand...

900 wins, it turns out, puts you in the company of two women - a dream situation for any red blooded male Raider - except for somebody they call "barbossa".

DT! The Georgia Tech Scout bbs discussed Tulsa dropping us from their schedule - for like a minute - but it's worth a peek.

DT! In other message board madness - I've realized that if Aggies were to dedicate all the hours they spend telling Texas Tech folks how superior they are to us they could have made a Tahoe that runs on maroon watermelons by now. Instead they don't realize that that they have become a lol factory.

So you're saying there's a chance...

2008-01-14T19:49:00.000-06:00

"Sounds about right to me"

Bodog College Football Futures

50 to 1 Tech wins the MNC next year...

Ryland Reed Post Season Accolade

2008-01-13T20:15:00.000-06:00

Mark Schlabach at ESPN.com has selected a "2007 All-Bowl Team."

Ryland Reed is his starting left-tackle. That and a buck won't get you a cup of coffee at Starbucks - but as the old pappy used to say "That's better than a sharp stick in the eye."

No doubt about it.

Interestingly, he left Chis Long - that's Howie Long's son by the way - off the All-Bowl team. I'm beginning to wonder if Mark actually watched the Gator Bowl - but any publicity is good publicity - especially for a guy who is recovering from surgery on his ankle.

From all of us at DiscoTech! we hope Ryland has the best of recoveries.

You'll pardon DiscoTech!'s lack of basketball coverage...we are much bigger football fans than basketball fans - and we tend to make fun of Bobby Knight more than shower him with adulation.

We appreciate what the man has done for Tech basketball. We encourage him to get his 900th win and in the post-game news conference promptly retire and hand the team over to Pat.

We will try to get excited - we really will.

In case you missed SportsCenter yesterday

2008-01-11T06:39:00.000-06:00

Introducing Kenny George...

Tyler Hansbrough is a big guy - like 6' 10" or so - and he looks like he should be playing JV ball when he's playing against Big Kenny...

Crazy video - just had to share.

The AP Poll in a little more detail

2008-01-08T19:13:00.000-06:00

Just so you know - you can go to the AP's website and get information on how poll voters actually voted...while this is a quite tedious during the season - the final poll is always fun to look at.

I don't think the coaches disclose who they vote for in the USAToday poll immediately after the poll - info on the last poll of December as we headed into bowl season was made available a few days after the poll was actually released...

Especially when you end up ranked - which Tech has done for only the third time in Mike Leach's eight years at Tech.

So thanks to the big win we have something fun to talk about...

Here's the final poll before we get started:

1. LSU (60) 12-2 1,620

2. Georgia (3) 11-2 1,515

3. USC (1) 11-2 1,500

4. Missouri 12-2 1,347

5. Ohio State 11-2 1,346

6. West Virginia 11-2 1,342

7. Kansas (1) 12-1 1,303

8. Oklahoma 11-3 1,139

9. Virginia Tech 11-3 1,096

10. Texas 10-3 962

10. Boston College 11-3 962

12. Tennessee 10-4 904

13. Florida 9-4 685

14. Brigham Young 11-2 654

15. Auburn 9-4 648

16. Arizona State 10-3 587

17. Cincinnati 10-3 566

18. Michigan 9-4 508

19. Hawaii 12-1 460

20. Illinois 9-4 443

21. Clemson 9-4 353

22. Texas Tech 9-4 308

23. Oregon 9-4 253

24. Wisconsin 9-4 202

25. Oregon State 9-4 110

Others Receiving Votes

Virginia 66, Penn State 61, Kentucky 57, Wake Forest 53, Boise State 25, Arkansas 13, Utah 9, Mississippi State 7, Appalachian State 5, South Florida 5, Tulsa 4, Connecticut 3, Air Force 2, Rutgers 2.

Dropped From Rankings

Virginia 21, South Florida 23, Boise State 24, Arkansas 25.

Some interesting results -

5 votes for Coach Moore's 13 and 2 Appalachian State team (losses to Wofford and Georgia Southern).

Interesting also is South Florida who was at one time second in the nation ends up polling level with App State and just ahead of Tulsa who will be on Tech's non-conference schedule next year.

Seven of our 2008 opponents were in bowl games. UMass, which competes in Division I-AA lost in the second round of the FCS playoffs.

I know - I'm a going on a tangent here - but here's next year's schedule:

2008 Schedule

(2007 record in parenthesis)

Aug 30 TULSA (10-4) Lubbock

Sept 6 at Nevada (6-7) Reno, Nevada

Sept 13 SMU (1-11) Lubbock

Sept 20 MASSACHUSETTS (10-3) (Parents W.) Lubbock

Sept 27 Bye

Oct 4 at Kansas State (5-7) Manhattan, Kan.

Oct 11 NEBRASKA (5-7) (Homecoming) Lubbock

Oct 18 at Texas A&M (7-6) College Station

Oct 25 at Kansas (12-1) Lawrence, Kan.

Nov 1 TEXAS (10-3) Lubbock

Nov 8 OKLAHOMA STATE (7-6) Lubbock

Nov 15 at Oklahoma (11-3) Norman, Okla.

Nov 22 BAYLOR (3-9) Lubbock

Anyhow...back to the poll...

Let's have look-see at some of the pollsters and their opinions of the national championship picture, the Big 12 and Texas Tech....

Chris Fowler - uhhh...no votes from Chris Fowler - so at least he's got his good hair and Jay Leno-like giant pumpkin head still working for him. He even voted Oklahoma as better than Mizzou (yes, I understand OU won the heads-up game) even after OU was embarrassed by WVU and Mizzou stomped Arkansas. In general he clearly doesn't like the Big 12 teams.

Kirk "The Love Bug" Herbstreit - was brutal to his alma mater and ranked them - correctly - 7th even while the Bucks finished overall polling at 5th. he ranked Tech above Virginia and kept a deserving UVA team in the top 25. I like Herbie more and more every year - I think he knows his stuff.

Craig James - well this ought to be interesting - will he have to withhold from voting for Tech next year when Adam is on the team in earnest? A high rank of 19 from Craig who was also rightfully brutal to Ohio State and got the Missouri Kansas conundrum more correct than others with Mizzou at 4 and KU at 5.

Stuart Mandel - Is a fan of the program apparently because he ranked us 14 - which is not only a high ranking but makes me wonder is Stewart wasn't high when he filled out his ballot. But I sure as heck appreciate it - and in case you missed it - Stewart has already released his top 10 for next year - and Texas Tech is....not in the top 10 - we are "a team to watch."

Molly Yanity - Seattle Post-Intelligencer - Molly didn't give us any votes - but what do you expect from a newspaper that makes up words and names their paper the "Intelligencer?" Do yourself a favor and don't do a Google Image Search for Molly - you'll only be disappointed - seriously.

Kirk Bohls - Austin American-Statesman - In what can only be characterized as a "shocker" - Kirk ranks his hometown Texas Longhorns #11 - and Texas Tech #12. What?! Wait. Tech's highest single polling came from Austin. Whaaaaa??? Have I ever told you there are seriously good drugs available near Town Lake - specifically near the Congress Bridge? Well there must be.

Joseph Duarte - Houston Chronicle - must not have watched the BCS Championship - or the Sugar Bowl - or the Rose Bowl - he voted OSU #2. Super serious. His editor is nuts.

Ray Fittipaldo - Pittsburgh Post - ditto the above.

John Hunt - The Oregonian - I'm beginning to think the Great Northwest doesn't know about the Jewel of the South Plains - no votes for TTU.

Rich Kaipust - Omaha World-Herald - Kansas Jayhawks #2 - I gotta say - there's a case to be made there - they just drilled VaTech - a game I thought for sure the Hokies would run away with.

Scott Wolf - LA Daily News - Thinks that despite the fact LSU won the BCS Championship game - that matters little because Georgia is #1. In other Hollywood scripts - Tulsa is #25 while Tech is unranked in his poll. And to top that off - Virginia ends up #21 in his poll - only falling one spot after their Gator Bowl loss. Oh Yeah - and Utah is #24. Hollywood - it's a whole other world.

Israel Gutierrez - Miami Herald - Kansas Jayhawks - National Champs!

That's the basic highlights - there were about 4 other pollsters that didn't rank Tech - and every single one of them kept Virginia in the 20 - 23 area. I guess I just don't understand some of these guys and gals.

Are they making some sort of statement with their votes? They will not be oppressed and will vote they way they want?

Also - I swear I thought I saw 5 votes for App State and yet not a single poll I clicked on had App State ranked - I thought I clicked them all - but I guess I didn't.

ESPN - please can Lee Corso

2008-01-06T08:37:00.000-06:00

To quote a friend of mine that put this nicely - because this sort of a PG-13 blog:

"Corso is a dumb monkey."

1. Harrell wears the number 6 - not the number 15.
2. Texas Tech has won 4 of their last 5 bowl games (I have no idea what Virginia Tech's recent bowl record was going into the Orange Bowl was) even though Corso clearly meant Texas Tech - he got his tongue caught on Virginia Tech's penis or something. After all, if it's a college football game on ESPN, odds are Virginia Tech is a participant.

So anyhow - here's Desmond Howard's visit with Michael Crabtree as presented on College Gameday on New Year's morning...

Gator Bowl Karmatic Amazingness

2008-01-01T18:27:00.000-06:00

Another incredible finish to another heart-stopping Texas Tech Football season. Another come-from-behind victory in the fourth quarter - and high hopes for a strong squad in 2008...let's get to it...

Bourbon distillers reported an above average consumption of their favored beverage as the clock rolled from 12:00 pm through 2:00pm Central time all over Texas, almost without regard for human alcohol toxicity.

At least that's what went down at my house.

Many more gray hairs will fall to the bottom of the shower in the morning as I head back to my cubicle. Why Dear Lord must you put us through these trials so soon after the birth of Baby Jesus?

DT! Graham Harrell was penalized twice in the first half for two safeties...aw hell...you saw the game as well I'm sure. What was going on was...Chris Long and his defensive line buddies were absolutely on point from the first snap - and as has been common throughout our season, our guys need (but shouldn't) to get knocked around a little before they get going.

DT! I thought that it was absolutely amazing that Virginia didn't commit a single penalty in the entire first half - a bit of karma/yin-yang Asian Rim voodoo that would play a serious role in the second half. We'll get to that later.

DT! I turned to my wife after we went up 7 to nothin' on Detron Lewis' TD and said "We're going to crush them." You can blindfold me and shoot me at daybreak.

DT! I'm a big message board reader as some of you know - and I find that the greatest entertainment known to man - and yet still largely undiscovered by the masses - is reading message board "Game Threads." That is, for the uninitiated, a topic of discussion dedicated to the events of the game as it happens live. In these threads any junior high mind can call for the defensive coordinator's head of his choosing. In this case - Ruffin McNeill.

Listen fellas, did you think after 15 more practices we were all the sudden going to come out and play Minnesota Vikings style run defense? During summer camp Tech will have 15 practices in only a little over one week...so installing an entirely new defensive scheme is not even an option folks.

And Ruffin McNeill should be given the opportunity to be Tech's DC. I think Tech is reaping the rewards of coaching staff consistency as they recruit. Ruff is a big part of the fact that we have some absolute studs coming our way on defense in this coming class.

So Tech allowed a 96 yard run that was a SportsCenter "Top Plays" nominee tonight. Don't tell me you were shocked - just don't.

DT! I can't recall when Tech came out and kicked an onside "surprise" kickoff...it always seems that kind of stuff is happening TO us - is that just me? Al Groh said in his post-game interview that the Cavs prepared for those sorts of things because it was a part of our "aggressive nature." Search me - I had no idea we had that play in our playbook.

DT! Crabtree was great today by the way. Focused the entire game even when things weren't going well for him personally, much less for the entire offense.

DT! I appreciated very much the commentary by Gary Danielson and Verne Lundquist as it related to Crabtree's "Jim Brown" moment in the second half. I thought both those guys did a great job today and were absolutely professional. My only gripe would have been to note that they cheered on big #71 of Virginia's OL as he celebrated a big play - but then didn't bring nearly the contempt to bear on the "Unsportsmanlike" call on Parker only 3 minutes later. They still derided the call a bit but failed to make the connection that I thought was right there in front of their face.

DT! Oh yeah - the officiating. I would call it "equally bad for both teams." Tech seemed to pick up a lot of little BS calls - while Virginia had the one big call go against them. Groh was told the fumble by Crawford was unreviewable - the better made up word would be "un-challengeable".

Groh just couldn't let that call go - and his post-game presser was littered with blame directed at the officiating.

So, Coach Groh, get over it. The call happened early in the second and you had LOTS of opportunity to recover. And it wasn't even a scoring play. The irony for Red Raiders is clear - and there's lots to go around:

1. Your team wasn't penalized a stitch in the first half and probably only had 3 flags thrown against you all game.
2. You should have watched our last few game films against UT.
3. Karma's a bitch.

DT! In keeping with the karma theme, I should counter that negative comment about Groh with a positive one about Chris Long. I had never seen this kid play before today. Holy son of famous pro football player Batman! Did you know he was Howie's kid? The kid is flat out amazing - and single-handedly dominated the game at times. I wish him the best of luck in his NFL career and will watch him many times and say "Remember when he blew up Tech's OL?"

DT! We lost a great O-Lineman today in what had to be one of the more gruesome broken legs I've seen in a while. Rylan Reed is a great man - and deserves better than a broken leg for his trouble. Our thoughts and prayers are with him for a speedy recovery - one that is without trouble or concern.

DT! While Coach Groh is convinced that the deciding factor today, I'm not. I think it was the injury to his QB, Jameel Sewell for all but the entire fourth. His freshman QB was serviceable, but was clearly thrown into a situation for which he was not prepared. The real wonder was when Colby Whitlock all of the sudden blew through the line and blew up a screen. The unfamiliarity with the speed of the game ended up being the deciding factor.

DT! So Tech has now won 5 of their last 6 bowl games - only losing to 'Bama on a dead-duck-last-gasp-sorry-good-for-nothing field goal that barely crossed the pipe two years ago. Good thing I'm not one who remembers things like that. Our bowl record is still for crap as a whole - but that's certainly not Mike Leach's fault who runs his bowl record to 5 - 3.

While we're on the subject of bowl victories let me make sure we're clear on something. Despite the team's poor performance today - they still won the game. And since we haven't been in the business of getting into Big 12 title games, these bowl trophies are important. If we continue to fill our trophy case with these bowl wins, higher and higher quality recruits will continue to grace us with their presence and we may actually be able to put one of those crappy looking NCAA horrible looking but undeniably important trophies right out front of the football offices.

So no bitching and moaning about lack of discipline and mental errors and on and on and on...

The scoreboard says we scored more points than the other team - and they would trade places with us in a heartbeat. So we must be doing something right.

DT! The folks who get paid to write about college football take notice of our continued success:

5. No one has played better bowl games over the last three years than Texas Tech.

The win over the Cavaliers might have been a thriller, but it was nothing compared to 44-41 overtime win over Minnesota in last year's Insight Bowl. The 13-10 loss in the 2006 Cotton Bowl wasn't exactly thrilling, but it was a close battle until the end.

Virginia's bowls have been just as good with an overtime collapse in the 2004 MPC Computers Bowl to Fresno State and a 34-31 win over Minnesota in the Music City Bowl. Bowl games are all about making money and putting butts in the seats, but they also want compelling games.

At this point, Texas Tech has become an extremely attractive bowl draw.

That would be Pete Fiutak on Fox.com. He's a pretty impressive guy and always makes the talk radio rounds during the season. I hope he gives us some praise as he call into FOX radio shows this week. A great recap of the game.

DT! No doubt that there were "good seats still available" at the game. So Pete Fiutak's comment should come as welcome salve to those of you who were disappointed by the massive amounts of blue seats at the game. Let's keep in mind that the University of Florida Gators happened to be playing a big game of their own just down the road. Any potential Gators that might have bought a ticket were elsewhere - and I heard some rumblings that Jacksonville residents felt game tickets were priced out of their range.

So the crowd was dominated by UVA and Tech folks - which I'm sure made the atmosphere plenty electric despite the slim crowd.

To re-iterate - it won't have a thing to do with whether or not Tech is (or is not) chosen for another top-flight bowl game (see Fiutak's comments above).

DT! Shame on ESPN News for not showing a single highlight of the Gator Bowl for a FULL 2 HOURS after the game had concluded. They were far too busy masturbating to Lloyd Carr and their very own Capital One Bowl to pay attention to the thriller in Jacksonville...

DT! Thanks to Scotty at TVTanLine for once again hooking us up with some awesome screen caps - I'll be liberating some of these images and adding them to my hard drive soon...

DT! Richard Justice at the Houston Chronicle wrote a great piece that is quite flattering to Tech today as well - potential recruits and their families should take the time to read it...as should readers of this blog...

That's all for now - I'm sure I missed some topics of discussion - feel free to comment below - we'll sure miss our Seniors and we'll talk about how hard it will be to replace them sometime this spring...we appreciate all the blood and sweat they've shed so that we can be entertained - and frustrated.

another booger eater joins Chase Daniel

2007-12-30T11:03:00.001-06:00

When you are in attendance at ANY event that is on national TV - it should not have to be pointed out to you that there are cameras live all over the pace - and that the intertubes are ready and waiting to be sure your booger eating is on display for all eternity...

I'm just doing my part to educate the masses:

This fella joins Chase Daniel as 2007 "Caught on Tape" booger eaters...congratulations to both of you on your achievement.

http://ramblingraiders.blogspot.com/2007/10/hard-hitting-mizzou-preview.html

there's no crying in football people

2007-12-30T08:32:00.001-06:00

Christmas YouTube Dump

2007-12-24T09:50:00.000-06:00

CBS Gator Bowl Preview:

Thanks to skattershooting for uploading this gem from the 5A Division I State Final game:

That's Jim Rackley at his best - and his worst. Having grown up in the shadows of D W Rutledge and Jim Rackley I can tell you that is a normal day on the sidelines for The Rack.

Emily Jones was flustered. I know some of our readers are taken with Emily - sorry that this video doesn't reveal some of her best features.

But Saturday was Trinity's day, as the Trojans came away with a 13 - 10 win.

Will I apologize?

2007-12-24T08:14:00.000-06:00

When something is not a failure but a success and you call it a failure...well that may deserve an apology.

How about when you call something a failure but...

Nevermind...

I called Brian Mayes out and he couldn't tell me the I Like Mike fund was working on spending the money charitably. He feared that it would give away the surprise of the event and I can understand that.

The I Like Mike Fund was not a failure.

While I don't regret calling Brian to the carpet and asking for a little accountability, it turns out my timing was just dreadful and now I have a bit of egg nog on my face.

No biggie. It won't be the last time that will happen I'm sure. I think Brian handled all this pretty well and so I apologize to him for being an ass.

So - to the real story at hand. The I Like Mike Fund raised about $5000 and worked with the Tech coaching staff to use that money to purchase food for the less fortunate and they distributed that food on Saturday.

"It doesn't surprise me that coach Leach would not take the money to pay his fine,'' Mayes said. "This really was always a symbolic gesture to tell coach Leach that, We appreciate your passion for the university. This is our way of showing our passion for you as a coach.' ''

Leach called today's event "a chance to enjoy the holiday season with our fans and those less fortunate than us.''

"We've got great support here,'' Leach said. "Our fans show a lot of commitment to us. We wanted to show our commitment to them, so together we're committed like the pig.''

Mayes said that he plans to keep the fund drive open and wants to use donations for other charitable purposes on an annual basis. Some of the money left over this year, he said, will be used to help send underprivileged children to a Tech game next season.

You gotta love Mike Leach getting in a poke at the commitment of the pig. That guy is a sound bite machine. You also have to love it that Coach would take time out of his busy schedule to deliver the goods himself. He could have easily asked that the money be donated to the Food Bank or to a shelter - but he got in there and went to work himself.

As other fans from rival teams come read these pages - we know this is just one example of why we fight to keep Coach Leach in Lubbock. Even with all his warts - he's a hard working guy - and a man that connects with the fans and the students personally. May he remain at Tech for a very long time.

So again - I look like the Grinch and Brian Mayes looks good - although it's clear his intent was never to trumpet his own name. I hope you continue to come back and read the blog every now and then Brian, maybe one day our paths will cross IRL and I can buy you the beverage of your choice.

Let's not forget that the real winners are a bunch of folks who got a little extra to eat over a cold Christmas weekend, and let's not forget to thank those that gave.

We here at DT! wish all of you a Merry Christmas! Please be safe out there.

(Even if you are a Big 12 official.)

Manny to see game action?

2007-12-22T11:12:00.000-06:00

Detroit Free Press

Injuries may provide an opportunity for Manny to get some playing time in the upcoming Lions game against the Chiefs on Sunday:

"Mulitalo on Friday was listed as doubtful for Sunday's game against the Chiefs at Ford Field. Marinelli said if Mulitalo is out, Blaine Saipaia and Ramirez likely will rotate at left guard. Ramirez was a fourth-round pick out of Texas Tech this year. "He's tough from what we saw. He's been tough all year," Marinelli said. "That's what we liked about him. He's a good pass-blocker ... and he's worked hard. He's got the mental makeup."

I hope those with Sunday ticket will get us an update on how Manny does - we wish you the best big guy - Wreck 'em.

Checking up on the Cavaliers

2007-12-20T20:20:00.000-06:00

No, not LeBron's - the Cavs in Virginia...

Looks like The Sabre has found some Mike Leach material and we encourage all of The Sabre's readers to come to DiscoTech! and use our search function to find all kinds of Mike Leach craziness.

Looks like they haven't found Mike Leach as the weatherman - that will be fun.

Here's just one of our posts on The Head Pirate (aka TSO) for your enjoyment:

http://ramblingraiders.blogspot.com/2007/05/mike-leach-compendium.html

Al Groh probably isn't good at chess

2007-12-19T19:01:00.000-06:00

The former Tech coach loves to wear his sweatshirts
with the sleeves pushed up to the elbows

...that's not the reason he's probably not a chess player - it's just something I noticed when looking for pics of him...

Coach had his pre-Gator Bowl practice press conference on Tuesday. Several Virginia area media outlest were there to cover the event and share their take on Virginia's preparation for the bowl matchup against the Red Raiders.

After reviewing these articles, Coach Groh may need to take a course in strategery from GWB.

From the News and Advance in Lynchburg, Virginia:

Kansas State coach Ron Prince, a UVa assistant for five seasons, figured to be a good source on Texas Tech. Not so. Despite being in the Big 12, Prince's Northern Division Wildcats have not faced the Southern Division Red Raiders in either of his two years in Manhattan. They do next year, however.

"I told him, 'This is screwy,'" Groh joked. "'They're in your conference and we're going to be able to help you more than you can help us.'"

Coach.

Use the internet much? I'm sure you and Coach Prince had a nice visit and all - but you could have learned that K-State is "off-rotation" from any number of wonderful places call "internet sites."

The News and Advance does a good job recapping Coach Groh's short stay in Lubbock and the circumstances that brought him through town:

One of the many stops in Groh's career was at Texas Tech, where he was a linebacker coach for Rex Dockery in 1980. As has been the case throughout his career, it had a lot to do with Bill Parcells.

Groh was Parcells' defensive coordinator at Air Force from 1978-79 before Parcells left to be defensive coordinator for the New York Giants.

That prompted Groh to join Dockery's staff in Lubbock in 1980. Dockery, who was the Red Raiders' head coach from 1978-80, had been the schools offensive coordinator prior to that. The defensive coordinator at that time? Bill Parcells.

Dockery left for Memphis State in 1981 and Groh was hired by former West Point coaching pal John Mackovic to be Wake Forest's defensive coordinator. But Mackovic left two months later to be the Dallas Cowboys' quarterback coach, making Groh the Deacons' head coach. He was there from 1981-86 and went 24-40.

Back to Groh's pursuit of defensive strategy...this time from The Roanoke Times:

Virginia football coach Al Groh has no better source for information about pass-happy opponent Texas Tech than his old University of North Carolina coaching colleague, Gary Darnell.

Darnell is in his second season as Texas A&M's defensive coordinator but he's a little busy right now.

Darnell is serving as the Aggies' interim head coach for their Alamo Bowl matchup with Penn State.

"When I spoke to him, it was, 'OK, I've got a couple of minutes,'" said Groh, who said Darnell told him, 'I'd like to talk to you some more but we've got to go to practice.'

"I'm waiting for the return phone call. It's a little bit overdue from when it was promised. What would appear to be our best resource is not cashing in yet."

Okay Virginia. Since you haven't figured out how to find our schedule online, let DT! help you out with the result of Darnell's defensive strategy against Tech:

Here's the boxscore in case you missed it.

I thought you said that Virginia needed to keep Texas Tech from scoring points? Here's a tip Gary Kasparov can get on board with: Coach Darnell may not be the guy to ask about keeping Tech out of the endzone.

Finally someone in the Big 12 did give Al Groh some advice - and while this coach was not mentioned by name - I wonder if Coach Groh finally decided to call someone that actually played Tech and *gasp* maybe even beat us...

From HamptonRoads.com:

Among the suggestions Virginia coach Al Groh has heard from friends in the business on how to slow the Texas Tech offense is this one, provided by an unnamed colleague who has faced the Red Raiders:

“He said his plan was to put the best basketball players on the field that he had,” Groh said Tuesday.

I would rank this just ahead of whatever Coach Darnell might actually suggest. Basketball players might be fun to play against.

Charlottesville's CBS affiliate has their broadcast video available featuring the mighty Groh at the mic...

Maybe the weird strategy of dial-a-coach is partly responsible for Groh ending up on Stewart Mandel's list of "5 Worst Football Coaches." Mandel wrote this piece before the season kicked off (it was published 7/11/07) and so it's interesting now to see how prescient most of the list is...

#2? Coach Fran.
#4? Coach Doba @ Washington State
#5? Karl Dorrell

His "Just Missed" section includes Bill Callahan, Chan Gailey and Houston Nutt.

Stewie definitely swings and misses after excellent performances this season by Coach Groh, Tommy Bowden, and Ron Zook.

DT! Heather Dinich of ESPN.com reports on the loot that the bowl participants will be given this year. The Konica Minolta will be handing out Oakley Thumps to all the players. That's a $200 gift. Not a Nintendo Wii (BCS Championship Game, Holiday and Poinsettia) or an iPod Touch (Las Vegas Bowl). But it's no commemorative watch.

DT! The LA Times released their rankings and picks of bowl games today. The Gator clock in at the 12th most intriguing matchup. Just ahead of the Alamo and just behind BC versus Michigan State in the Champs Sports Bowl. Good grief. I'm concerned I might be taken to the ER by my wife to get me out of a coma if I watch the Champs Sports Bowl.

DT! I don't know who Chip Ramsey is, but I like this line:

Texas Tech scores like an oilman in a cat house with a roll of $100 bills. Virginia had a nice season, but really. Take Texas Tech.

Wreck 'em.

Not his best side...

2007-12-13T06:58:00.000-06:00

Maybe it's a bad camera angle or the lighting...

Your captions are welcome in the comments area...

Everybody's All American

2007-12-11T19:52:00.000-06:00

I couldn't keep track of all of these different teams - I hope these links and a special spreadsheet I put together help out...

AP also notes in their press release:

The last freshman to be an AP All-American was Oklahoma running back Adrian Peterson in 2004.

Sporting News

AFCA

AFWA

Walter Camp

Because I'm a visual learner - I created this document for you - hope it helps you sort through the maze of All American Teams and the rare company that Michael Crabtree has joined this year.

Only seven players made all five All-American first teams. While I have no idea about this from a historical perspective - it is nonetheless an incredible achievement. When you look over the list you'll see some players that were omitted from only one list (Matt Ryan instead of Tim Tebow say the Coaches Association......really?) and so can't make the claim to be on all 5 lists.

Some players only made one list - but clearly are incredible players - I think Xavier Adibi is amazing and yet can't believe he's only made one First Team...

Thanks to Seth for showing me that Google Documents is cool and easy...

EDIT: Reader noted that Sedrick Ellis of USC was named to all 5 teams as well - I need an editor...Thanks for the fix.

Crabtree and Harrell awards, ranking the bowls, etc

2007-12-10T20:07:00.000-06:00

DT! More plaudits for Mr. Crabtree (and the first for Graham Harrell):

Red Raiders.com

Crabtree was named Freshman of the Year and he received the Paul Warfield Award, like the Biletnikoff, given annually to the nation's top receiver.

Crabtree joins Texas Tech quarterback Graham Harrell as an honoree of The Touchdown Club of Columbus. Harrell was awarded the Sammy Baugh Trophy as the nation's top quarterback. He is the third Tech quarterback to receive the award, after Kliff Kingsbury in 2002 and B.J. Symons in 2003.

All of the post season awards are wonderful and have already raised the profile of the program, recruiting is seeing a definite improvement already, and all I want for Christmas is a Big 12 Championship.

A true test awaits Crabtree in the Gator Bowl and next year. The target will be n his back - and he will get measured for a new hat size - let's all hope that it's the same hat size he wore in the Spring of 2007.

DT! I didn't do it - but this outfit did...

South Carolina's "The State"

Gator Bowl clocks in at #15 - I haven't had much time to think about other bowls that might be more exciting...

Just thought you guys might want to see it...

DT! Brian Mayes has asked me to contact him in the comments section of the post below. Brian, in case you couldn't tell I already contacted you. I'm asking you to contact me.

Of course whatever you tell me will be reported here immediately, so why don't you craft a communication in your own words and send it to me. That way I can't be accused of bending the facts.

You've brought yourself into the public forum - and need to be accountable.

Dear Brian Mayes,

2007-12-09T18:39:00.000-06:00

An exercise in self-gratification

How's that "I Like Mike Fund" going?

One of the things I'm really a big fan of is accountability. You can't just go sending off press releases - getting your idea promoted by the likes of ESPN and The Dallas Morning News and then expect that we would just forget?

Those major media outlets have moved on - the "I Like Mike Fund" is of no interest to them - they're busy with bowl games and NFL Playoffs and whatnot...

Not me.

You got some 'splaining to do, Lucy.

So let me do some guessing and see how close I am - and if I'm wrong - you send me an e-mail to the blog - make sure you send that to discotechblog@gmail.com.

Let's start:

How close am I?

Please tell me I missed the press release you sent about the planned picture with coach Leach and yourself holding a big check.

Now, please tell me you sent everyone their money back.

And tell me Plains National Bank has helped you in this effort. Nice deal on their part getting a little free publicity. PNB has been a big supporter of Tech over the years - so they should be first in line to be sure that no Tech alumni were harmed in the making of this farce.

So Brian, tell me I'm wrong.

We're waiting.

Wes Welker and The Masked Rider

2007-12-08T12:05:00.001-06:00

Want to read a short biography? I should note that it is a well written biography. Jim McCabe of the Boston Globe brings us a great story about Wes and his rise to prominence and nationwide man-crush status (Link to NY Times blogger Mark St. Amant).

I should also note that it's a bit long - so grab a beverage and enjoy.

Yes Welker

Oh Wes, we knew you when.

My favorite bit of McCabe's article:

In his four years at Heritage Hall, Welker had scored 90 touchdowns in an assortment of ways - 53 on the ground, 27 on passes, 7 on punt returns, and 3 on interceptions. For good measure he had added 35 field goals, 165 extra-point kicks, and four 2-point conversions. Use your fingers, toes, and calculator, and you'll get 818 points in 49 games, an average of 16.7 per. Oh, and by the way, as a defensive back he made 190 tackles, had 22 interceptions, and 9 fumble recoveries.

Is that all?

Now - about the Masked Rider...

Kevin Burns happens to be Seth's man-crush at the moment - and he may have already commented on this in my absence...

Kevin Burns "Sanctioned" by Masked Rider Advisory Committee...

For those that haven't been keeping up - years ago this same committee deemed it unsafe to ride across the Jones at full tilt with the reins in your mouth and not in your hands. I can understand that. Last thing we want is to lose a Masked Rider. I get the felling Kevin's a better horseman than that though.

I think Kevin's legend grows as his mustache does. Anyone that saw him on national TV busting tail across the field with his guns up - well that was just awesome.

The man in the black hat...the lawman who breaks all the rules and steals all the ladies hearts...

Kevin Burns is trouble.

"Tell them I'm comin'! And Hell's comin' with me! You hear?!? Hells' comin' with me!"

Crabtree - Consensus All-American

2007-12-07T21:39:00.000-06:00

From RedRaiders.com:

Texas Tech wide receiver Mike Crabtree on Friday achieved consensus all-America status with his inclusion on The Sporting News all-America team.

Consensus status is conferred players who make a majority of the five teams recognized by the NCAA — The Associated Press, The Sporting News, the Football Writers Association of America (FWAA), the American Football Coaches Association (AFCA) and the Walter Camp all-America team.

Crabtree, who leads the nation in catches (125), yards (1,861) and receiving touchdowns (21), has made each of the first three all-America teams that have been released. The AP and Football Writers will announce their teams next week.

Crabtree is Tech’s eighth consensus all-American, according to athletic department research. The others are center-linebacker E.J. Holub (1959-60), wide receiver Dave Parks (1963), running back Donny Anderson (1964-65), defensive tackle Gabe Rivera (1982), punter Mark Bounds (1991), linebacker Zach Thomas (1995) and defensive end Montae Reagor (1998).

Also on Friday, Tech defensive tackle Colby Whitlock and linebacker Brian Duncan were named to freshman all-American teams by CollegeFootballNews.com. Whitlock was a second-team honoree and Duncan a third-team choice.

Congrats Crab. Now go help the team get a Big 12 title.


	Billy Packer will reportedly be replaced by CBS studio analyst Clark Kellogg.